This Year's Model of Humanity

This is applies to friend-based slash or het.

A sexual relationship doesn't have to cheapen a deep love-based friendship, but it can if you let the sex overwhelm the friendship.

The important thing to remember is that a sexual relationship doesn't replace friendship. It's about adding the sexual dimension to the already existing relationship. You keep all the layers that are already there, but add this new one.

I love the Buffy/Xander relationship as it's illustrated on the show. Why would I want to mess with a good thing? I don't, which is why I try to keep in mind all the history (good and bad) that they share. Now, how successful at it I am, only my readers can say, but I always try to keep them friends first.

People are complicated. Every single person is incredibly complicated and there is no way to catch all of that in the confines of a single story. All any of us can do is try. All we can do is to do our best to find moments and passages that we can capture and bring to life. Find moments of truth and clarity and passion. Find ourselves in the characters and find the characters in ourselves.

The reason that Buffy and Xander fall in love in my mind is because I love them both, and my mind can see to lighting the way for them to see in each other what I see in them.

That's what relationship-based writing is for me.

A little while ago, elynross asked what people found interesting about Draco and Snape.

In explaining myself, I eventually went to the images that pop up in my head when I think of Draco (a little kid in a robe shop, chatting and being a miserable failure at being friendly. An eleven year old boy who was terrified of the Forbidden Forest and who was horrified at the sight of a dead unicorn. A child who, upon feeling himself insulted, immediately goes on the attack and insults right back). It was a fairly enjoyable exercise, so I'm extending to the Buffyverse. This isn't just going to be for the characters I like, since this is my way of explaining what I see when I look at each character. So, they won't all be nice images. If I missed someone that you want covered, please let me know.
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I may do some of the others later, as it is fairly enjoyable to write that all down.