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butterflyPart One is here.
This next part is a rough-cut. I'm going to redo it on Monday, after I rewatch some more of the middle S4 Angel's. I do need to leave now, though, for my dad's.
Part Two: A Gentle Push
Cordelia, in retrospect, did an amazing job of cutting Connor off from the others.
She enters without memory - a complete innocent. She gets scared off by the others and saved by Connor. This sets up their relationship, which Cordy ensures revolves around him protecting her (and, in time, their child). She trusts him and goes with him.
And here is the key point: even after Connor fails to protect her, she chooses to stay with him.
For the first time in Connor's awareness, someone has chosen him. More importantly, Cordelia, the person who Angel implied was uppermost in his thoughts, chose Connor over Angel, who was uppermost in both Holtz and Fred/Gunn's minds. So, Cordelia is, in a fashion, the highest possible - since she was the chosen love of the one everyone else chose. And she chose Connor.
And she says that the reason that she chose Connor is because he was honest with her. He acted like she was an adult, not a child, even though she was without memory.
Now, the gang's theory is that Jasmine was woken up after the memory spell, but even so, I'd say that she probably had a hand in Cordy's subconscious choices before then. Because memory-less Cordy acts in a way that helps with one of Jasmine's goals: securing Connor.
Before Cordelia, Connor was interested in finding out who/what he was. With her there, his thought is focused toward helping her, though he isn't without the pettiness of not bringing back any pictures of Angel.
After they kiss, Cordy tells him that as long as she has no memories, she shouldn't make any big choices. This sets up her going to Angel, and also helps facilitate the 'make Connor and Angel jealous of each other' plan, because she asks Angel if they loved each other, then at the end, tells him they did, and then she goes back to Connor.
She sleeps with Connor, offering him something 'real', which is the true heartbreak. Because, as Connor realizes later, it isn't real. Her love for him is nothing but trickery to bring Jasmine into the world. She offers a lie, but it's a pretty one and it's a lie that Connor is willing to believe.
And after that, Cordy stresses that she wants to be with Connor but she can't because of Angel.
Around this time, Connor develops his hate for magic. (and here I'm going to actually write about why this was important and suchlike. I truly think that it was)
The Angelus period makes everything worse for Connor, because it adds a new element: his mother. What Angelus says, Connor believes. Perhaps because of Cordelia's words, "he lies with the truth." Angelus fails to permanently hurt anyone but the one person that Angel was most desperate to save. I think that he'd chalk it up as a success.
Some people think that there weren't enough consequences for bringing back Angelus, but it had a huge effect: Angelus confirmed Connor's belief that he was fundamentally unlovable. Which, of course, leads to Connor's statement in Players: "I'm going to have a child and all you can do is joke because you don't like me."
The team plans to trap Evil!Cordy. They don't share with Connor. How could they not expect him to side with Cordy when they've never shared their side of things?
After she's been revealed to the gang, Cordelia finally outright attacks Angel: "This is how much he hates you."
Connor finds it easier to believe in his father's hate than his mother's love. And he's willing to do anything to hold onto his family. Even something that he knows is wrong.
He kills. For his child. For his hope that this love isn't a lie.
Killing an innocent in cold blood: it doesn't get much darker than that. And he knows this.
And then Jasmine comes. He gets his last chance to pretend. But this time, he knows that he's pretending.
So, was Connor doomed at this point? No. The mere fact that he found it so easy to pretend to believe and be happy as long as his father was on the same side that he was shows that he wasn't doomed. He's been pushed off the edge, but there was still time for someone to catch him.
This next part is a rough-cut. I'm going to redo it on Monday, after I rewatch some more of the middle S4 Angel's. I do need to leave now, though, for my dad's.
Part Two: A Gentle Push
Cordelia, in retrospect, did an amazing job of cutting Connor off from the others.
She enters without memory - a complete innocent. She gets scared off by the others and saved by Connor. This sets up their relationship, which Cordy ensures revolves around him protecting her (and, in time, their child). She trusts him and goes with him.
And here is the key point: even after Connor fails to protect her, she chooses to stay with him.
For the first time in Connor's awareness, someone has chosen him. More importantly, Cordelia, the person who Angel implied was uppermost in his thoughts, chose Connor over Angel, who was uppermost in both Holtz and Fred/Gunn's minds. So, Cordelia is, in a fashion, the highest possible - since she was the chosen love of the one everyone else chose. And she chose Connor.
And she says that the reason that she chose Connor is because he was honest with her. He acted like she was an adult, not a child, even though she was without memory.
Now, the gang's theory is that Jasmine was woken up after the memory spell, but even so, I'd say that she probably had a hand in Cordy's subconscious choices before then. Because memory-less Cordy acts in a way that helps with one of Jasmine's goals: securing Connor.
Before Cordelia, Connor was interested in finding out who/what he was. With her there, his thought is focused toward helping her, though he isn't without the pettiness of not bringing back any pictures of Angel.
After they kiss, Cordy tells him that as long as she has no memories, she shouldn't make any big choices. This sets up her going to Angel, and also helps facilitate the 'make Connor and Angel jealous of each other' plan, because she asks Angel if they loved each other, then at the end, tells him they did, and then she goes back to Connor.
She sleeps with Connor, offering him something 'real', which is the true heartbreak. Because, as Connor realizes later, it isn't real. Her love for him is nothing but trickery to bring Jasmine into the world. She offers a lie, but it's a pretty one and it's a lie that Connor is willing to believe.
And after that, Cordy stresses that she wants to be with Connor but she can't because of Angel.
Around this time, Connor develops his hate for magic. (and here I'm going to actually write about why this was important and suchlike. I truly think that it was)
The Angelus period makes everything worse for Connor, because it adds a new element: his mother. What Angelus says, Connor believes. Perhaps because of Cordelia's words, "he lies with the truth." Angelus fails to permanently hurt anyone but the one person that Angel was most desperate to save. I think that he'd chalk it up as a success.
Some people think that there weren't enough consequences for bringing back Angelus, but it had a huge effect: Angelus confirmed Connor's belief that he was fundamentally unlovable. Which, of course, leads to Connor's statement in Players: "I'm going to have a child and all you can do is joke because you don't like me."
The team plans to trap Evil!Cordy. They don't share with Connor. How could they not expect him to side with Cordy when they've never shared their side of things?
After she's been revealed to the gang, Cordelia finally outright attacks Angel: "This is how much he hates you."
Connor finds it easier to believe in his father's hate than his mother's love. And he's willing to do anything to hold onto his family. Even something that he knows is wrong.
He kills. For his child. For his hope that this love isn't a lie.
Killing an innocent in cold blood: it doesn't get much darker than that. And he knows this.
And then Jasmine comes. He gets his last chance to pretend. But this time, he knows that he's pretending.
So, was Connor doomed at this point? No. The mere fact that he found it so easy to pretend to believe and be happy as long as his father was on the same side that he was shows that he wasn't doomed. He's been pushed off the edge, but there was still time for someone to catch him.
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Re: Again, fascinating to read
Date: 2003-06-29 08:53 pm (UTC)That is probably so true and I only don't know because I... didn't watch most of the Baby!Arc.
*hides*
And yes, good point re: poor Connor's doomed love.
Re: Angelus
And I really doubt that Connor would know about the play anyway. But yeah. It makes me so very sad in retrospect. Even more than it did the first go-round.
I don't blame you a bit...
Date: 2003-06-30 01:32 am (UTC)Re: I don't blame you a bit...
Date: 2003-06-30 02:24 am (UTC)But yes, in retrospect, knowing that we get VK? The Baby!Arc was worth it.
There was a third!
Date: 2003-06-30 02:29 am (UTC)