Non-survey stuff.
Nov. 26th, 2001 01:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
butterflyFirst off, thanks for all the birthday wishes. Y'all are sweet.
It's been an odd few days. Keeps going from extreme happiness to shock to sadness to happiness again.
I think that the quality that I value most in people is the ability to look beyond the surface of things. Look beyond the label 'boy band' or the title 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer to the quality that was there all along. And all of you have that quality. And now I'm getting all sappy and Giver-eske. (I love that book. It's probably my favorite short book.)
And I love that it doesn't matter that I have no idea no old most of you are, where you live, or what you look like. Because none of that stuff should matter.
Y'all have taught me so much. More than I could ever express. Through you guys, I've learned so much about life and about caring. All of you have, at times, amused and touched me. You've given me pretty pictures to squee over and deep philosophical statements to think about. You've taught me about other cultures, other religions(thanks, Em), other things that are just so incredibly amazing, even if I've done them, because I get to see them through your eyes.
And today, I think, is the most appropriate day for me to say these things. I've survived another year. I've experienced another year of sorrow, joy, pain, and hope, and I'm still standing.
I never feel so calm as after I pray. Last night, I prayed and asked God to keep Karen close to him. She died a Catholic. She died regretting her past sins. So, she died clean. And she's happier, in Heaven. Her life was so... she wasted so much of how she could have been because she didn't believe in herself. I don't want to do that. I don't want to die wishing that I'd lived.
See, I went all sappy.
It's been an odd few days. Keeps going from extreme happiness to shock to sadness to happiness again.
I think that the quality that I value most in people is the ability to look beyond the surface of things. Look beyond the label 'boy band' or the title 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer to the quality that was there all along. And all of you have that quality. And now I'm getting all sappy and Giver-eske. (I love that book. It's probably my favorite short book.)
And I love that it doesn't matter that I have no idea no old most of you are, where you live, or what you look like. Because none of that stuff should matter.
Y'all have taught me so much. More than I could ever express. Through you guys, I've learned so much about life and about caring. All of you have, at times, amused and touched me. You've given me pretty pictures to squee over and deep philosophical statements to think about. You've taught me about other cultures, other religions(thanks, Em), other things that are just so incredibly amazing, even if I've done them, because I get to see them through your eyes.
And today, I think, is the most appropriate day for me to say these things. I've survived another year. I've experienced another year of sorrow, joy, pain, and hope, and I'm still standing.
I never feel so calm as after I pray. Last night, I prayed and asked God to keep Karen close to him. She died a Catholic. She died regretting her past sins. So, she died clean. And she's happier, in Heaven. Her life was so... she wasted so much of how she could have been because she didn't believe in herself. I don't want to do that. I don't want to die wishing that I'd lived.
See, I went all sappy.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Happy Birthday!
Date: 2001-11-26 02:28 pm (UTC)And today, I think, is the most appropriate day for me to say these things.
I have a weird little birthday ritual. Each year I go off someplace alone for a few hours and write letters to everyone who's had a big impact in my life that year. Sometimes it's been a good thing and sometimes it wasn't (ahem, evil ex-boyfriend). I write about whatever they taught me - good or bad and how that made me a better person (even the bad stuff can make you better). I don't necessarily send the letters - though sometimes I have - but I always keep them until the next year when I burn them and write new ones.
Weird, huh? Probably the one time each year when I'm introspective and not shallow. Heh. It sounds like you have sort of the same thing going on.
Re: Happy Birthday!
Date: 2001-11-26 02:33 pm (UTC)Thanks for the birthday wish.
That's a neat idea. Worth trying out. Very interesting.