Hmm. So this writing thing...
Apr. 5th, 2003 02:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
butterflyI joined up with two drabble groups (though I'm guessing y'all knew that, what with the posting), and I've been trying to write more. Dare myself, like.
Anyway, I just felt like chatting about writing and why it's so bloody hard for me and such things.
For example, Buffy is impossible this year. I'm finding it exceedingly hard to get inside the girl's head (and until she starts acting sensibly, a girl I will call her). I did my trio of B/S drabbles, but they really only served to confuse me further. Because. I can still see that girl, the one I wrote about, and yet. She doesn't feel like Buffy to me. Buffy/Spike never feels like Buffy to me. She's just some fucked-up blonde slayer. Not my girl. I've been trying to get my Buffy-sense back since First Date and it's hard.
I recently wrote a Xander-ficlet set season seven (which I linked but never posted), in which I'm pretty much Xander.
Seven Years and Counting
I've never really understood her. Part of my initial attraction to Buffy was the 'new girl' thing. She was hot, she was interesting, and I didn't know a thing about her.
After seven years, she's still impossible to understand sometimes. She can still surprise me. Maybe if I'd ever gotten her, I would get her. Maybe if I knew her body, I could know her mind.
She frustrates the hell out of me. She confuses and annoys. She can be the most stubborn woman in the world. She falls in love with the evil dead and still manages to be the best person I know. I want to talk sense into her sometimes and I hate some of the choices she's made but...
After seven years, she's still a mystery.
I want to know her. I want to know all her quirks, her loves and hates. I still feel like I only know part of her.
Maybe that's why I can't let go.
~the end~
Xander always makes sense to me. (except for Once More, With Feeling, which makes no sense, even in just that episode. The guy sings in "I've Got A Theory". And you can't lie in song. Sweet says that and it bears out for everyone else. The only possibility is that he was lying out of song, ie at the end when he said he did it.) I feel like I am Xander, in a million ways that have nothing to do with the specifics and everything to do with the inner core.
My last five fics have been: BtVS, *nsync, BtVS, BtVS, and Smallville. That feels right. For all my... dissatisfaction, nothing else on TV makes me care like Buffy does. Buffy is in the ranks of really good movies, for me.
I'm always afraid of my charactizations. Because I see so little of the show the way it seems the majority does. So I worry.
And I correct. I've edited this post several times, fixing things, adding things.
Anyway, I just felt like chatting about writing and why it's so bloody hard for me and such things.
For example, Buffy is impossible this year. I'm finding it exceedingly hard to get inside the girl's head (and until she starts acting sensibly, a girl I will call her). I did my trio of B/S drabbles, but they really only served to confuse me further. Because. I can still see that girl, the one I wrote about, and yet. She doesn't feel like Buffy to me. Buffy/Spike never feels like Buffy to me. She's just some fucked-up blonde slayer. Not my girl. I've been trying to get my Buffy-sense back since First Date and it's hard.
I recently wrote a Xander-ficlet set season seven (which I linked but never posted), in which I'm pretty much Xander.
Seven Years and Counting
I've never really understood her. Part of my initial attraction to Buffy was the 'new girl' thing. She was hot, she was interesting, and I didn't know a thing about her.
After seven years, she's still impossible to understand sometimes. She can still surprise me. Maybe if I'd ever gotten her, I would get her. Maybe if I knew her body, I could know her mind.
She frustrates the hell out of me. She confuses and annoys. She can be the most stubborn woman in the world. She falls in love with the evil dead and still manages to be the best person I know. I want to talk sense into her sometimes and I hate some of the choices she's made but...
After seven years, she's still a mystery.
I want to know her. I want to know all her quirks, her loves and hates. I still feel like I only know part of her.
Maybe that's why I can't let go.
~the end~
Xander always makes sense to me. (except for Once More, With Feeling, which makes no sense, even in just that episode. The guy sings in "I've Got A Theory". And you can't lie in song. Sweet says that and it bears out for everyone else. The only possibility is that he was lying out of song, ie at the end when he said he did it.) I feel like I am Xander, in a million ways that have nothing to do with the specifics and everything to do with the inner core.
My last five fics have been: BtVS, *nsync, BtVS, BtVS, and Smallville. That feels right. For all my... dissatisfaction, nothing else on TV makes me care like Buffy does. Buffy is in the ranks of really good movies, for me.
I'm always afraid of my charactizations. Because I see so little of the show the way it seems the majority does. So I worry.
And I correct. I've edited this post several times, fixing things, adding things.