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butterflyBecause, hey, everyone needs somebody to love them.
Also, I'm still not seeing the blondeness. Her hair is certainly lighter than someone else's, but that doesn't mean that it's blonde. I'd say light brown. But that's what I call my own hair color, which my mom has argued is blonde.
Shockingly enough (not), I can't sleep. Usually can't after crying.
Not sure what to work on.
Like I said earlier, everything I do now feels like it's going to be the wrong thing. It can take a while for that to work out of my system.
Though it will. It took a fucking long time for me to build up my feelings of self-worth and I'm not going to let someone else's view of me knock them back down.
When bad things happen, I close off, back away, and do the polite thing while burying my feelings. This is probably unhealthy. Hence the over-share today.
I don't get mad at people. Never found it too productive. And I generally only take off the overly-polite mask when I know people well - like Benton Fraser does, to use a fictional example.
I only argue with family. They're the only ones that I trust not to leave if I get mad once in a while.
To go back to talking about the rpg, in a very real way, Alexis and Aly are both me in different outfits. What I do with them... everything that I have written in the rpg has come from my heart and my muse. And I don't regret thinking it or writing it. I regret posting it in the wrong forum, but I still don't think that the subject matter is out of line in fiction. I don't think that any subject is out of line in fiction as long as you treat it respectfully.
But I do understand that not all people feel that way.
Also, I'm still not seeing the blondeness. Her hair is certainly lighter than someone else's, but that doesn't mean that it's blonde. I'd say light brown. But that's what I call my own hair color, which my mom has argued is blonde.
Shockingly enough (not), I can't sleep. Usually can't after crying.
Not sure what to work on.
Like I said earlier, everything I do now feels like it's going to be the wrong thing. It can take a while for that to work out of my system.
Though it will. It took a fucking long time for me to build up my feelings of self-worth and I'm not going to let someone else's view of me knock them back down.
When bad things happen, I close off, back away, and do the polite thing while burying my feelings. This is probably unhealthy. Hence the over-share today.
I don't get mad at people. Never found it too productive. And I generally only take off the overly-polite mask when I know people well - like Benton Fraser does, to use a fictional example.
I only argue with family. They're the only ones that I trust not to leave if I get mad once in a while.
To go back to talking about the rpg, in a very real way, Alexis and Aly are both me in different outfits. What I do with them... everything that I have written in the rpg has come from my heart and my muse. And I don't regret thinking it or writing it. I regret posting it in the wrong forum, but I still don't think that the subject matter is out of line in fiction. I don't think that any subject is out of line in fiction as long as you treat it respectfully.
But I do understand that not all people feel that way.
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(no subject)
Date: 2003-10-03 07:54 am (UTC)