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butterflyI keep thinking about what Angel said about Darla - "She never had a chance." Did she? She was a working girl in the New World, dying of syphilis. Not a life brimming with opportunity. Then she was a vampire, soulless. Just a monster. Taught by the Master.
And she was still a romantic. A vampire who'd once been a whore, who dreamed of a man to spend all of eternity with. "It's mythic." And a relationship where she had the power. She'd made Angel. And yet, in the end, he killed her. In the end, she couldn't keep him. Couldn't control him. "No one could keep up with you. Not even me."
We've known three vampires touched by souls, and all of them were unique even before that. All of them wanted something so desperately that they were willing to take a chance in embracing darkness, though none of them knew what they were getting into. Darla, who never minced words, who always longed for a view... always longed to live in a place where the surroundings were worth looking at. Spike, tired of being spit on and turned down, who longed for respect and for protection from his own frail heart. And Angel, who wanted to matter. Who wanted more than what he had and who thought that he deserved it.
Darla died an independant woman. William died in the care of his mother. Liam died under the rule of his father. Abandoned, smothered, spurned. All of them were miserable with their lives and all of them were looking for something - for life, for hope, for something bigger. And they found it.
Darla could be a powerful lady in silks and blood. Spike could kill anyone who laughed at him. And Angelus could have fun with no father to tell him no.
All three of our 'special' vampires were trapped by where they were in life, and becoming vampires allowed them to leave their situation.
But they couldn't escape who they were. Darla said it herself, "What we once were informs all that we have become."
So many important things happen in alleys on these shows. Both Spike and Angel were made in alleys. Darla died in one. Connor was born in one. An alley is a place of transformation in the Buffyverse - it's where Faith has her breakdown in 5x5. It makes sense - an alley is trapped between two buildings, mouth open to the street and all of it open to the sky. And it's a dirty place. Transformations rarely occur without pain and suffering and dirt. Buffy hits her lowest point in an alley - pummeling Spike in Dead Things.
Darla dies the first time in a shuttered room. The second in a dark club. The third in a hotel room. And the fourth in an alley. Only the fourth was of her agency. The others were done to her, but the alley transformation, she chose. In that moment, Darla finally had the power. And she used it for the right reason.
She earned her redeemption, I believe. In her first human life, she gave up on God and welcomed the devil. In her second, she embraced the notion that she was meant to die and that it wasn't such an evil thing. And then, as a souled vampire, she gave up her life for her son's. She died a mother the last time.
And she was still a romantic. A vampire who'd once been a whore, who dreamed of a man to spend all of eternity with. "It's mythic." And a relationship where she had the power. She'd made Angel. And yet, in the end, he killed her. In the end, she couldn't keep him. Couldn't control him. "No one could keep up with you. Not even me."
We've known three vampires touched by souls, and all of them were unique even before that. All of them wanted something so desperately that they were willing to take a chance in embracing darkness, though none of them knew what they were getting into. Darla, who never minced words, who always longed for a view... always longed to live in a place where the surroundings were worth looking at. Spike, tired of being spit on and turned down, who longed for respect and for protection from his own frail heart. And Angel, who wanted to matter. Who wanted more than what he had and who thought that he deserved it.
Darla died an independant woman. William died in the care of his mother. Liam died under the rule of his father. Abandoned, smothered, spurned. All of them were miserable with their lives and all of them were looking for something - for life, for hope, for something bigger. And they found it.
Darla could be a powerful lady in silks and blood. Spike could kill anyone who laughed at him. And Angelus could have fun with no father to tell him no.
All three of our 'special' vampires were trapped by where they were in life, and becoming vampires allowed them to leave their situation.
But they couldn't escape who they were. Darla said it herself, "What we once were informs all that we have become."
So many important things happen in alleys on these shows. Both Spike and Angel were made in alleys. Darla died in one. Connor was born in one. An alley is a place of transformation in the Buffyverse - it's where Faith has her breakdown in 5x5. It makes sense - an alley is trapped between two buildings, mouth open to the street and all of it open to the sky. And it's a dirty place. Transformations rarely occur without pain and suffering and dirt. Buffy hits her lowest point in an alley - pummeling Spike in Dead Things.
Darla dies the first time in a shuttered room. The second in a dark club. The third in a hotel room. And the fourth in an alley. Only the fourth was of her agency. The others were done to her, but the alley transformation, she chose. In that moment, Darla finally had the power. And she used it for the right reason.
She earned her redeemption, I believe. In her first human life, she gave up on God and welcomed the devil. In her second, she embraced the notion that she was meant to die and that it wasn't such an evil thing. And then, as a souled vampire, she gave up her life for her son's. She died a mother the last time.