(no subject)

[butterfly]

So, I'm working on things now. Essays and such. But then I was just thinking and I was blindsided by how much I adore Angel in Not Fade Away. He's a hero, but in the classic sense rather than the modern -- he's Herakles, family-killer, infamous, dangerous, beloved and hated by the gods. He's Samson, bringing his enemies down with himself. Fucked-up beyond belief. Certain of his own place in hell. I have never loved Angel as much as I do in that last episode.

To twist it around, Chosen was one of the times when my complete love of Buffy overwhelms me. It's interesting how my love for the two characters manifests in opposing fashions -- I want Buffy to be happy, but I want Angel to be certain. Balls to the wall, no way out, but he'll bite and slash and claw his enemies down with him.

And I don't want that for Buffy.

Anyway, it all got me thinking about love, about moments where my love for a character shines its brightest and what that might mean as to the kind of love that I hold for them. What does it mean that I love Angel most in the struggle and that I love Buffy the most in the times after?

That I love Daniel the most when he's sacrificing himself? I've seen most of Stargate SG-1 now, and Meridian remains, hands-down, my favorite episode. It's the moment just before he starts shooting, when it clicks for him and he makes a choice. Every single time I watch that moment, it hits me the same way. In that moment, I adore Daniel Jackson so much that I feel as if I can't breathe.

Definitive moments, perhaps. A moment in time when the reason that I fell for that character in the first place eclipses everything else.

Comments

[scrollgirl.livejournal.com]

Very interesting question, and I must admit it's not one I've ever given much thought to. I know that I love Wesley best in that final scene in "Loyalty", when he's caught between the horror of Connor's prophecy, his need to protect the innocent, and his love/loyalty to Angel. All episode he's become more isolated, pushing to find answers, not wanting to life to be so cruel -- then Angel shows how much he loves Connor, and would never hurt him, and Wes has a brief respite -- until it's cruelly snatched from him, and he's pushed to the utter edge. I love Wes best when he's on the edge and damning consequences and all the fates to do what (he thinks) is right.

And I have to agree that I love Daniel best when he's sacrificing too. Whether it's his life or his rights or his ideals, I love him best when he's denying himself for the sake of others. (I don't think this makes me a St. Daniel fan, though. St. Daniel is a whole other phenomenon.)

Also, I like what you say about Angel as the classic hero. I immediately thought of Samson when I heard Angel's plan in the final scene of the penultimate episode (I forget the ep title), and I love his words about bringing the walls down around W&H. The Samson parallel really hammers home the idea of W&H as a temple for evil. (But I love when Angel makes religious allusions.)

[butterfly.livejournal.com]

I love Wes best when he's on the edge and damning consequences and all the fates to do what (he thinks) is right.

Oh, yes, poor Wesley, he's lovely like that.

I don't think this makes me a St. Daniel fan, though. St. Daniel is a whole other phenomenon.

Completely different, I agree. There's a difference between loving someone at their best and thinking that that's all there is.

Also, I like what you say about Angel as the classic hero. I immediately thought of Samson when I heard Angel's plan in the final scene of the penultimate episode (I forget the ep title), and I love his words about bringing the walls down around W&H. The Samson parallel really hammers home the idea of W&H as a temple for evil. (But I love when Angel makes religious allusions.)

It was thinking of that deeply tragic side that made me like him in the first place. Angel's beautiful when he's on a suicidal mission.