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butterflyTitle: LoveGame
Summary: Plans backfire, emotions get messy, and sometimes we become what we hate most.
Pairings: Kris/Adam; Adam/Katy; Kris/Katy
Rating: NC-17; Sexual Content
Notes: Written for the![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
ontd_ai kink meme. Prompt: Adam/Kris/Katy. Katy makes Adam a trade. Adam can take Kris’s (guy) virginity if Katy gets to take Adam’s (girl) virginity. A night for the ages ensues. Your choice about reasons/consequences.
LoveGame
planning special surprise for kris's 25th. Wanna help out?
When Adam got the text from Katy, he didn't really think anything of it. It seemed sweet, exactly the sort of thoughtfulness that made Kris and Katy's marriage work – they never seemed clingy, but did very nice things for each other when important events happened. So he texted back of course i would. Just let me know how and went on with his day.
She texted him a time for a meet-up and named the place as her L.A. apartment with Kris – she'd planned carefully then, picking a time when Kris would be out at meetings and Adam was free. He briefly wondered how she knew his schedule so well and then he scolded himself for being silly. He'd told Kris. Of course, she knew.
When she answered the door, it was obvious right away that she was nervous. When he heard her proposal, he understood why.
“You want me to fuck Kris,” Adam repeated. “Your husband. That Kris.”
“For his birthday,” she said, her voice slightly tight and her smile just a touch fake. She probably thought she was successfully selling it but there was definitely something wrong here. “But... to make it fair and to make him feel better, you should... do me, too.”
“I don't do girls,” he said but his head was miles away, giving himself permission to take Kris's shirt off, undo his pants, lick and suck and- he shivered.
“You want my husband,” Katy said evenly. Adam only barely kept himself from flinching at how matter-of-fact she sounded. “And part of him wants you. But he's a good man. If you sleep with me, too, then he won't feel like it's adultery. It'll probably easier for him if I go first.”
So that Kris gets to have Adam second and it feels even less like he cheated. There's a coldness in her deal that Adam hadn't realized she was capable of but... he gives her a long look and she stares back, determined. Maybe it didn't exist before Idol, before Kris had met Adam.
Adam bit his lip and he wondered if this could possibly be worth it – a night with Kris was something a part of him had wanted ever since Hollywood Week. But one where they were watched with possessive eyes, where he knew that it was only supposed to be a one-time thing to make Kris 'get over' Adam... and it might. Doing this might drive Kris away from him forever. He closed his eyes and remembered the last time he'd seen Kris – they'd hugged and talked about nothing much important and Kris's hand had lingered on his arm.
“It's a limited time offer,” Katy said, and his eyes snapped open again. Now, he could see the brittleness in her and she was probably worrying, too. Maybe scared that doing this could her lose Kris but more scared... more scared that not doing this would make her lose Kris even more surely.
“Okay,” Adam said. She took in a tiny, lost breath and maybe even she hadn't known whether or not this was the right direction to go, but now that he'd agreed, now that he'd let himself thinking about touching Kris, he couldn't take it back. “Okay, it's a deal.”
So that was how, two months later, he'd ended up at the Allens' place, waiting for them to get back from dinner. He'd made an appearance at Kris's birthday lunch, an industry-based event that Kris had been miserable at, so he was glad that he was going to get to wish Kris 'happy birthday' again, even if the circumstances...
He was just hoping that this wouldn't end up being a huge mistake.
Katy had told him to wait in the bedroom, but when they didn't show up at eight, he got restless and he was actually in the little kitchenette scrounging for a snack when they stumbled in. Katy was holding her strappy high heels in one hand and as soon as she was through the door, she and Kris were kissing, his hands tangled in her long blonde hair. Kris had backed up against the door, closing it with a muted thud, and Adam couldn't see where Katy's other hand was. Funny, all this time and he'd never, ever been jealous of Katy but now-
He'd never seen them like this.
He must have made a sound because suddenly Kris pulled away from Katy and was looking directly at him. Kris looked like he was slightly tipsy, but not even close to drunk and he was clearly confused, so Katy had really meant the 'surprise' part.
“Adam?” Kris asked, hesitantly, like he wasn't even sure that Adam was really there. “Did- did I invite you over? I mean-” And it was striking the way he'd just completely stopped touching Katy the second he'd noticed that Adam was there. For the first time, Adam had to wonder if Katy had had reason to be worried. “-not that you need an invitation. I just wasn't expecting you.”
“Katy invited me,” Adam said, taking a step out of the kitchenette and toward the pair of them. Katy put her shoes down on the table next to the front door and she looked a little upset. Maybe she'd been planning on saying something on the way to the bedroom. “She thought it would be fun.”
Kris's lips parted and his forehead crinkled up and he glanced between Katy and Adam with a look on his face like they were the latest Times crossword. “But... Katy, you said-”
“I said that I wanted tonight to be special,” Katy said. Adam didn't know her nervous tics as well as he did Kris's, but her fingers were knotted together tight, the knuckles white. “I thought Adam could be part of it.”
“I don't- is this a joke?” Kris backed up further, flattening himself against the door. “It's... it's not funny.”
And Adam was just about ready to agree with Kris and laugh it all off when Katy strode up to him, face determined, and yanked him down against her mouth. Adam's mouth had already been slightly open and Katy wasn't shy about sticking her tongue straight in. Adam wanted to pull away, but she was so damn tiny and he just froze. After a long, awkward moment, she let him go and he brushed nerveless fingers down the front of his shirt, taking a shaky step backward. Katy turned to face Kris and Adam turned his head that way, too – Kris didn't look upset anymore, but he was clearly still baffled and not at all on board Katy's crazy threesome train.
Then Katy went to Kris and kissed him, and Adam could see their mouths moving and Kris's hand reached up to cup Katy's cheek. When she pulled away, there was a wet noise and a tiny strand of saliva that lingered for a moment, and then Kris touched his mouth, his nose wrinkling.
“I said that there'd be something special in bed tonight,” Katy said, her hand resting on Kris's arm – Adam could see her thumb rubbing in a circle, trying to soothe. “And that's Adam.”
“He's not a thing,” Kris said, quietly, and he wasn't looking at either of them. Katy shot Adam a panicked look over her shoulder and he just shrugged. It was all in Kris's hands now and Adam wasn't going to force him into anything that he didn't want. “Katy, why?”
“I see the way he looks at you,” she said. “And I... I see the way you look at him.” Kris flinched like she'd just landed a body blow, and then he nodded. “This way- this way nobody does anything wrong.”
“You think I'll cheat on you,” Kris said. He looked up to meet Katy's gaze and Adam could see his eyes over Katy's shoulder and he looked... he looked betrayed. Adam's fists clenched and he hadn't seen this coming, but he should have and all he wanted- all he wanted was to know that Kris was going to forgive him for this. “You think- what? That one day I'll just... snap and jump Adam? Beg him to let me blow him? Ask for his-”
“Kris,” Adam said, because Katy was curling up in on herself – he could see the tension in her back and shoulders, and she'd moved away from Kris, her hands hanging limp at her sides. “Stop.”
And he did, he stopped mid-sentence. Then he looked over Katy's shoulder and met Adam's eyes and... the chill softened and the tiniest hint of a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Why'd you say yes, Adam?”
“Why do you think?” Adam asked and he was laying it all out there, if Kris was paying attention. Kris's tongue flickered out to wet his lips and he breathed in sharply.
“What was the plan, exactly?” Kris asked, turning his attention back to Katy. “You had a plan, right? What was it, honey?”
“It was... kinda a trade,” Katy said, and her voice got clearer and stronger as she continued. “I was going to be Adam's first, maybe only, girl and then he was going to be your only guy. Because- Kris, you remember your senior year of high school?”
“Yeah,” Kris said, and his mouth tightened.
“I just needed to get it out of my system, needed to sow some wild oats,” Katy said and she was really laying it on thick now, selling the hell out of her pitch. “But you didn't. You told me that. You didn't sleep with anyone that year we were separated-”
“You were the only one I ever wanted,” Kris said and Katy laughed, gently. Adam shifted on his feet, wishing that he was doing something else – anything else – right now.
“We both know that's not true,” she said. “I'm not stupid, Kris. Please don't pretend that I'm stupid.”
“I chose you, Katy,” Kris said, taking a step toward her. He reached out and his fingers brushed against her hair. “I went to college and I looked at... at guys, okay, yeah. But I didn't do anything with them, because I wanted you more than any of them.”
“Do- do you still want me the most?” Katy asked, her voice breaking. And then it happened – Kris looked away from her, his eyes going to Adam's for just a moment before he cast them downward, his lips pressing together. In its silence, it was louder than any words could be. And Katy took a step back, away from Kris. “That's what I thought.”
“What made you- when did you decide to do this?” Kris asked. He'd closed his eyes and he was just... standing there, trembling slightly. “When did you decide that I would cheat on you if you didn't do this?”
“Three months ago,” Katy said, and Adam thought back, because that was a month before she'd contacted him. The month before that he'd been-
“Adam's last night on tour,” Kris said. “When we went to see him close it out at Staples.”
“You two hadn't seen each other for, I don't know, maybe two months,” Katy said and – yeah, that was about right. “You hugged for what seemed like forever and neither of you noticed that I was standing there and Kris said-”
“That I'd never missed anyone so much in my life,” Kris finished for her and now his voice was shaky, too, and Adam wasn't the most experienced threesome guy ever, but it really wasn't supposed to go this way.
“Did you really mean that, Kris?” Katy asked. She wrapped her arms around herself, but Adam didn't think that she was feeling a physical cold. “Did you miss him more than you've ever missed me?”
“That's not a fair question,” Kris whispered. And Adam couldn't- he couldn't just stand there, so he moved past Katy and he pressed his hand against Kris's chest. Kris's eyelids popped open and Kris was staring up at him, and his eyes looked practically black in this light.
“Did you?” Adam asked. Kris's eyes lowered to Adam's mouth and he was pushing back, slightly, against Adam's hand. “Did you miss me more?”
Kris made a strangled noise in the back of his throat and, just like Katy had earlier, he hauled Adam down for a kiss. This time, though, Adam melted against Kris's mouth, parting his lips and darting his tongue out to touch Kris's. Kris kissed him back, open-mouthed, one hand sliding around to the back of Adam's neck and the other reaching down to tug at the top of Adam's pants as Kris deepened the kiss. Adam slipped his hand out from between their bodies and pressed it against the small of Kris's back and- despite the argument, Kris was hard against him.
With a rough sob, Kris broke away from him, turning his back on both of them, his shoulders shaking. Adam reached out, his hand just shy of touching Kris's shoulder.
Kris's slow, heaving breaths seemed to fill the room, choking out the rest of the air.
“I'm sorry,” Adam said, because he should have known better. He did know better. Kris had been off-limits the entire time they'd known each other, for good reason. Just because Katy had suffered some temporary insanity had been no excuse for Adam to play along. “I'll just... I'll get out of here.”
He headed toward the door, shooting a look at Katy, who was... so completely wrecked looking that he couldn't even be mad at her, no matter how much easier that would make this. He turned the knob and-
“Wait.”
Adam froze at the sound of Kris's voice. He twisted around to face them, and Katy was staring at Kris, who was looking at some place in between both of them.
“Katy's right,” Kris said. He reached down and started unbuttoning his shirt, starting at the bottom. Adam couldn't help it – his eyes went to the sliver of stomach that Kris had revealed and, as Kris moved upward, undoing each button in turn, Adam's gaze followed. Kris shrugged off the shirt and it fell into a crumpled heap at his feet. “We have to do this now that it's been started. Otherwise, it's always going to be there, every time that we touch.”
He reached down to the button on his pants and it was Adam's turn to ask Kris to wait. Adam didn't look at Katy this time, just went to Kris and folded himself down onto his knees. “Let me,” he said and Kris took his hands away, lightly resting them on Adam's shoulders.
He stared up at Kris, practically daring him to look away – Kris met his challenge, and Adam kept up the eye-contact as he unbuttoned Kris's pants and slid down the zipper. He slid Kris's slacks down to mid-thigh and he could see black boxer-briefs at the edge of his vision.
“This for Katy's benefit?” Adam asked, rubbing the material between his thumb and index finger. “Because she said she had something special planned.”
Kris nodded, ever so slightly. Adam slid his hand to see if – yeah, they were the kind that snapped open for easy access. Popping open the snap was unnaturally loud in their artificial silence and Kris's eyes widened, his fingers tightening on Adam's shoulders. Adam leaned forward, finally breaking eye-contact with Kris as he opened the flap and licked up the length of Kris's dick. He drew it out and lazily ran his hand up and down a few times. He'd seen Kris naked a lot over the past couple of years, but pretty much always in the middle of changing clothes. Not like this. He pressed a soft, lingering kiss to the head of Kris's cock, a little extra hello.
“Oh, god.”
Adam jerked in surprise, since women's voices didn't tend to feature in his sex – he'd actually... he'd forgotten that Katy was there. He huffed out a frustrated breath and Kris's cock twitched against his mouth. So he pursed his lips and blew out a gentle stream of air and Kris actually quivered all over. He considered making Kris come right here and now, but Kris deserved better than a quick blow job used to prove a point, so when he did start licking, he kept it soft and light. Besides, Kris had a cock that was worth exploring. Adam flicked his tongue around the flared head and had to reach up to brace Kris when he started to sway. He wrapped his arm around Kris's hips and pulled him in close, sucking Kris's balls into his mouth and rolling them around a bit with his tongue.
Kris was starting to make noises, tiny stifled whimpers that were hitting Adam in all the right places. Adam let Kris's balls slip back out of his mouth, his tongue making a brief detour to the skin directly underneath... but Kris wouldn't be ready for that yet, so he licked his way back up Kris's cock, doing his best to find any quirky hot spots that Kris had. He slid his lips over the head of Kris's cock and then kept going all the way down, not stopping until his nose hit Kris's belly.
He stayed until Kris's hips started jerking against him erratically, swallowing as Kris came in his mouth. He sucked lightly through the pulses, until Kris started to try to weakly push him away, and then he pulled off, giving Kris's cock one last lick goodbye.
He glanced up to assess the situation: Kris's mouth had dropped and he was practically panting, his eyes half-closed, and his dick was soft and used. His hands were still clutching Adam's shoulders and his face was shining with sweat. In one graceful motion, Adam stood, his hands gliding up Kris's body.
Kris focused on him and then smiled. “Where you going?” he asked, a hint of a pout in his voice.
“Oh, don't worry, that's not the end,” Adam said, ruffling his fingers through Kris's hair, then stroking down over the smooth skin of Kris's back. “Besides, it's your turn to set the rules. It is your birthday.” He leaned closer, whispered in Kris's ear. “And I'm your present.” Kris shivered and Adam licked at Kris's neck, not wanting to leave marks. “We'll do whatever you what.”
Kris froze for a second when Adam said 'we' and then he relaxed, nodding. “Okay. That's... okay.” And that was... that was one of the things about Kris that always impressed Adam, how easily he adjusted to any situation.
Kris pulled away from Adam and Adam reluctantly let go and his gaze followed Kris's over to where Katy was. Kris opened his arms and she came running, hitting him hard enough that he swayed where he stood. She buried her face in Kris's shoulder, saying something that Adam couldn't make out.
“It's going to be fine, honey,” Kris said, his hands stroking up and down Katy's back. “We're going to follow your game plan and see if the play pans out, all right?”
“All right,” Katy said, barely loud enough for Adam to hear.
“What happens next?” Kris asked. Katy lifted up her mouth to Kris's ear and whispered something to him, and he nodded slowly – Adam could see him lick his lips and Adam felt a sudden, sharp desire to suck Kris's lower lip into his mouth and suck until it was fat and swollen. Kris was unhooking Katy's dress and lowering the zipper and then she stepped backward, letting the dress fall down to the floor, the wash of crimson fabric like a bloodstain on the white carpet. She was wearing black underneath and she looked even smaller without her clothes on.
“Adam,” Katy said, and she seemed much calmer now, though she was slightly flushed. “We should probably go into the bedroom.”
“No,” Adam said, and he could do this, he'd decided. It was the same as any other part and he'd done enough with girls to know that it wasn't repulsive, just not his preference. “Not yet.”
He reached forward and encircled her wrist with his hand and drew her over to the couch, keeping his gaze on her and on their destination, because he wasn't sure he could do this if he kept looking at Kris. He sat down on the couch and pulled her on top of him, and this time when he kissed her, he threw himself into the role. Because he'd decided to view tonight as a gift, no matter what happened, and that meant that Katy deserved the biggest 'thank you' in the world.
She made a little shocked noise when he undid her bra with one hand and he kissed it into a full-blown moan. Her hands were small but warm, slipping under his shirt to touch him, and she kept pressing hot kisses against his neck. She had on diamond-drop earrings and a thin gold-cord necklace, but they didn't seem like they were going to get in the way, so Adam didn't bother getting them off her. He slid his hand under her ass and licked at her breasts and her hard pink nipples until she was asking him for more in a tiny voice.
He could hear Kris breathing unevenly, somewhere behind him.
Adam slid his hand down inside her panties – he'd forgotten that girls got so wet – and he rubbed his fingers against her clit, pressing and exploring until she was shuddering out a release.
He brushed a kiss against Katy's cheek and said to her, “I put a condom in my back pocket, just in case I needed it in a hurry – are you feeling ready?”
“Yeah,” she murmured, and she wiggled out of her panties, and Adam slid the condom packet out of his back pocket and opened up his pants. Katy took the condom from him and rolled it down on him, biting down on her lip in concentration. It was oddly adorable and he brushed a fond hand over her head, fingers catching a little in her hair. She positioned herself over him and then hesitated for a moment.
“I know,” Adam said, stroking a reassuring hand over her hip. “You'll want to go slow.”
She hissed as she lowered herself onto him and he let himself feel the difference – he'd done a few things with girls back when he was a kid, but he'd never done this. It was like fucking, but it felt... muted. Softer. Kinda like eating cotton candy instead of a steak. He let her set the pace, his hand on her hip only to support her, not guide her.
When it looked like she needed it, he pressed his hands against her again, lightly pinching her nipples and reaching down to stroke her until another climax shook her body, tightening her around him in rippling waves. After she was done, she kissed him softly and asked if he was close.
“Don't take it personally,” Adam said, because he was definitely hard and her rocking and wiggling had kept him that way but-
“It's not what you want.” And Kris's voice was in his ear and his hand was on Adam's shoulder. Adam's hips jerked up involuntarily and his mouth opened in a gasp. He turned his head and Kris had one knee up on the couch next to them, and Adam couldn't read his face at all. And he couldn't help it – he reached out and wrapped his arm around Kris's waist, tugging him closer. Kris leaned forward and they were kissing and he felt Kris's hand brushing against Adam's cock, feeling the place where it connected with Katy's body.
Kris broke the kiss and Adam had to lean back just to breathe. He watched as Kris and Katy kissed, lusty and dirty, and Kris's fingers were touching her now, only occasionally slipping off to brush against Adam's cock. Then Kris pulled away from her and he was ducking down and- his mouth replaced his fingers, and he was licking at Adam and Katy, and Adam had gone from being forever five steps away from orgasm to half a breath away. He couldn't really see what Kris was doing, but he could feel Kris's mouth, his tongue, right at the base of his cock.
He tangled his hand in Kris's short hair and just held on, biting down on his lip to keep from saying anything stupid as he emptied himself into the condom. He leaned forward to brush a kiss against Katy's mouth, and he whispered, “Thank you.” She put her hand on the back of his neck and kissed him, harder and deeper, until he was afraid that she was bruising her mouth. When she pulled away, she didn't look up to meet his eyes. She lifted herself off and Adam took off the condom, tying it, and then he tucked himself back in his pants. When he looked up again, she and Kris were talking to each other, very quietly. They kissed, light and easy, and then Katy pulled away and headed toward Kris and Katy's bedroom.
Kris was still standing just close enough for Adam to reach, so he grabbed Kris's wrist and tugged him closer. In a way, Adam was glad that he'd had the edge taken off, because Kris was even more gorgeous like this than Adam had ever anticipated. “Everything okay?” Adam asked.
“Yeah,” Kris said, and he was staring down at where Adam was holding onto him.
“What-” Adam cleared his throat. “What do you want me to do?”
Kris reached his other hand down and lightly stroked over where Adam's fingers were wrapped around him, then he traced the lines of Adam's tattoo. There was a flash of color behind them and Adam glanced up to see Katy, dressed in pajamas, ducking out of her bedroom and into the guest room. Kris shifted slightly and Adam's attention went back to him immediately. He cupped Kris's cheek with his other hand and Kris leaned down for a kiss, and the sharp taste in Kris's mouth momentarily made Adam want to recoil, but he pushed past it, tongue exploring and tasting until only the taste of the kiss remained.
Kris's eyes were closed when Adam pulled away and he rubbed his thumb over Kris's lips, briefly dipping into the wet heat of his mouth. And Adam couldn't help it; he had to kiss Kris again, messy and lost.
“What do you want?” he asked again, against Kris's mouth.
“Everything.” Kris's hand pressed against Adam's stomach, right above his cock, and Adam shuddered. Kris's voice had gone deep, rumbling. “Give me everything.”
Too late, Adam couldn't help but think, but his only answer was to kiss Kris again, and then tug him off the couch. Everything that they needed for this was in the bedroom. He'd had plenty of time earlier to prepare, and to second-guess, and worry and hope. Once in the bedroom, Adam hesitated for a moment and then he shut the door behind them. Kris reached out to touch the hem of Adam's shirt.
“I can't believe you still have all your clothes on,” Kris said, toying with fabric. Adam reached down to cover Kris's hands with his own and Kris stilled, his gaze darting up to meet Adam's. His cheeks were flushed pink and Adam wanted- he wanted what he couldn't have, so he pushed it away and concentrated on what he could take, leaning down to brush his mouth against Kris's jawline.
“We'll fix that, don't worry,” Adam said, reaching over to tug Kris's pants down again. Kris was half-hard again, so it didn't look like Adam would have any problems making it good for him. “But I've got a plan of my own and it involves you taking your clothes off first.”
Kris kicked off his shoes – and he'd worn actual dress shoes for his night out with Katy – and Adam slid his pants and those black boxer-briefs all the way off, not being shy about caressing Kris's legs. Kris might be a small guy, but he was the furthest thing from weak. This time, Adam ignored Kris's cock, though he did brush a light hand over the curve of Kris's ass, enjoying the way it made Kris shiver.
“I want you on the bed,” Adam said and Kris nodded, biting at his lip. It might be a good idea for him to find something to put in Kris's mouth, just to save his mouth from getting chewed up. “Stomach down.”
Kris shot him a nervous look, but he still did what Adam had asked, though he turned his head to the side and kept his gaze on Adam. Adam picked up the bottle of massage oil that he'd left on the nightstand and uncapped it, pouring a generous amount into his hands. He put his hands on Kris's back and Kris let out a surprised huff of breath. Adam straddled Kris, which really was a better position to give a massage from anyway, and he started rubbing the oil into Kris's skin. It didn't take long before Kris was starting to relax underneath him, and Adam pressed soft kisses against Kris's shoulders – tasting the banana of the flavored oil – as he worked his way down.
He skipped Kris's ass and started working from his feet up, needing reach over once to add a little more oil. Kris's legs were well-muscled and Adam was pretty sure that an accurate sculpture of Kris could win handily against anything else that claimed to show the perfect male form. He licked the back of Kris's knee and heard Kris suppressing what sounded remarkably like a giggle. He explored further, but Kris kept silent, so Adam moved on and up.
Adam had been admiring Kris's ass for a long time. It had been hidden in baggy jeans for the first part of the show, but after they'd become roommates, he'd seen it now and again when Kris was changing. When Kris had asked him if the stylist was right in suggesting that Kris buy tighter jeans, Adam's answer had been a whole-hearted 'yes'. It was wonderful to finally get to knead and touch and stroke, and he was already thinking of how amazing it would feel to sink into Kris's tight heat.
He stroked his fingers across Kris's hole and the resulting flinch was smaller than he'd been expecting. He reached over to the nightstand and flailed around until he found the tube of lube that had managed to roll to the far end. It took him a little extra time to open it, his fingers slippery with the oil, but it would be better to do this the right way. He warmed up the lube in his hands and, this time, when he touched the ring of muscle, Kris only shifted slightly, already adjusting to the feeling.
Adam pressed one finger carefully into Kris, staying slow and easy. Kris muttered something that Adam couldn't make out, rolling his hips against the bed.
“Tell me if it's too much,” Adam said.
“It's okay,” Kris said and it would have seemed like a lukewarm endorsement, but Kris's face was drawn up in concentration, and his hands were clutching at the sheets, and his voice was low and thoughtful. “... probably could do more.”
Adam slipped a second finger in with the first and Kris rocked back into his touch, sighing.
“Thought about this,” Kris said, softly, and Adam couldn't tell at first whether or not he meant to say it out loud. His fingers were deep inside now, stretching Kris out. Adam kinda put them on autopilot, leaning closer to hear Kris's words. “Almost every night on the Idol tour, I used to wonder what it was like and I would... sometimes...” Kris's words drifted off a bit, his hips rolling back against Adam's hand. “I'd try to do this to myself, but it never felt right.”
Adam tried to blank out the mental image that Kris's words were drawing, but that was pretty much impossible. He wasn't sure which thought was better: Kris in his bunk on the bus, trying to stay quiet and needing to muffle himself as he pressed shaky fingers into his ass, or Kris on the hotel nights, letting himself be a little louder, spreading himself out on a bed and pretending that Adam was going to fuck him.
When he twisted his fingers around and finally found Kris's prostate, Kris jerked back against him hard, a sharp “Oh!” escaping him.
“Yeah,” Adam said sympathetically. “It's a lot harder to find that on your own.”
Kris didn't answer him, just pushed back against Adam's fingers, and his eagerness reminded Adam of how achingly hard he is – he knew that he should probably do a third finger, but he didn't- he wasn't sure if he could wait that long. Not when Kris was moving so smooth, catching the rhythm so easily.
Not even the cool drizzle of lube made him feel any less ready, so Adam wrapped a tight hand around the base of his cock as he eased his way inside. Even the initial push was less tight than he was expecting, with Kris so relaxed and welcoming. Adam braced a hand against the bed and just sank down, Kris's hot inner skin clinging to his cock like liquid silk. When he was all the way in, he licked at a tiny mole on Kris's shoulder, stroked his hands over Kris's slim hips, and tried to concentrate on anything except Kris's warmth surrounding him.
“How are you doing, baby?” he asked. Adam could see about a third of Kris's face from where he was, and Kris's mouth was slack, his eyes closed. Adam ran a smoothing hand up Kris's side and asked again.
“I don't-” Kris sighed, arching up against Adam's touch. “I never... never expected-” Kris huffed out another breath, sounding slightly frustrated. “I'm okay. I think. It feels...” He pressed himself up into Adam's hands with another light sigh.
“Shh, it's all right, you don't have to,” Adam said, petting at Kris's skin. That was close to perfect, too, soft and nearly unblemished. The slightest hint of a tan lent it a gorgeous golden tone and Kris still tasted like banana when Adam licked him.
Adam started to slide out- and Kris was reaching back and grabbing at his hip, with a lost little whimper. Adam stroked Kris's hand reassuringly, and thrust in. A small “oh” escaped Kris's lips when Adam pushed back in and Adam could feel him relaxing again. He might have to ask Kris, later, just what he'd been thinking there, how he could possibly have imagined that Adam was actually going to stop. If he could remember.
His strokes melted into each other, Adam's brain fuzzing out a bit. He managed to pull Kris up to his knees and wrap a hand around his cock and that was- that was good and it made Kris squirm even more and make sexy little noises and, really, it wasn't Adam's fault that he was nipping at Kris's skin and sucking hard enough to leave marks. Especially not when Kris responded so well, whimpering and whining and begging. Begging in soft, broken words that didn't even get close to being really dirty but hit Adam's gut like the filthiest porn that existed.
He held back long enough to feel Kris's cock jerk in his hand, feel the sticky hot strands shooting out, but then he had to let go, to lose himself inside Kris. He braced himself against the bed and it only took a few more stuttering thrusts before he was coming inside Kris, the slide of his cock becoming easier as his come slicked the way.
He managed to pull out before he collapsed, only landing partly on Kris. He reached down and pressed his fingers against Kris's hole, feeling how much looser and easier it was now and that's when the realization hit him.
He'd forgotten the fucking condom.
It wasn't- Kris wasn't really in danger, because Adam always always used a condom and he was pretty damn sure that he didn't have anything but... he never forgot. He'd never forgotten. He swallowed hard and his sleepiness was gone and he was hopping up out of the bed.
Kris rolled over, lazy and well-used. “You okay?” he asked. Adam nodded, grateful for his background in theater. Kris didn't need to share his freak-out, since it was too late to fix it anyway.
“Yeah, I just don't want to step on Katy's toes,” Adam said, and he didn't miss the introspective look that crossed Kris's face when he said Katy's name. “After-sex cuddling is really a 'wife' thing.”
“I guess,” Kris said. He seemed to realize that he was naked, because he was shifting and twisting until he was underneath the sheets. And... fuck, Adam had not wanted to make this awkward and stupid.
“This doesn't- this doesn't have to change anything,” he said, feeling lost and desperate, but doing his best not to sound that way. “One night only.”
“Birthday sex,” Kris said, his mouth twisting. Then he looked at Adam, really looked at him, and he smiled, that warm, friendly smile that he'd been wearing the very first time that they'd had a real conversation and Adam had realized that being from Arkansas hadn't meant that Kris was small-minded. “Adam... if you aren't my best friend, you're pretty close. We'll be fine.”
And, for a few weeks, that really seemed like it was true. They saw each other occasionally, talked on the phone a lot, and everything just seemed to settle back into place. Adam still had his on-and-off thing with Drake and he'd just started to relax about everything.
He'd like to be able to blame alcohol or pretend that he'd been in the middle of something with Drake when he'd had to leave for the party or anything external, really. But the truth was that it wasn't anyone's fault but his own.
The truth was that he'd been simmering under his skin since he'd first walked into the party and seen how closely Zac Efron and Kris were standing together, with Efron's hand on Kris's arm and both of them leaning in toward each other. Efron had yet to officially 'come out' as bisexual or anything else, but everyone knew that he did guys as well as girls and he was acting way too interested in someone who he damn well knew was taken.
... the irony of Adam's thoughts didn't escape him. Nor did the fact that he normally really liked Zac Efron but couldn't seem to currently work up an ounce of affection for him.
Adam circulated through the party, waiting for Kris to notice that he was there. Kris, though, seemed like he was too involved in his conversation with Efron to notice a bomb going off in front of him. The last straw came when Kris reached back, his hand brushing against Efron's shirt, possibly even touching his stomach.
Adam clapped a heavy hand on Kris's shoulder and even the brightness of Kris's smile as he turned and saw who it was didn't fix the ugly twist in the pit of his stomach. He said 'hello' to Efron and Kris with gritted teeth and then said, apologetically, that he really needed to talk to Kris alone about something.
He hustled Kris into the nearest empty room and shut the door behind them. Then he yanked Kris toward him and they were kissing, hard, all teeth and tongues and nothing fancy or sweet or pretty. He didn't have anything on him, so he ended up dropping to his knees and giving Kris a fast and dirty blowjob that tasted better than anything he'd ever put in his mouth. He pushed Kris's hand down onto his cock but then Kris was on his knees, and Adam hadn't even dreamed about that, and he was slow and amateur and Adam had to bite down on his lip until it bled, just to keep from screaming.
It was over in minutes and Kris was coughing a little, wiping come from his face.
Adam slid down against the door and pulled Kris into his lap, finally giving him the kiss he deserved, tender and aching. “I'm sorry,” he said, and they were both still dressed but so completely fucked.
Kris laughed and he sounded half-broken. “Never should have kissed you,” he said, but he leaned forward to do it again, lingering, his tongue licking at where Adam had bitten his own lip open.
“Are you-”
“I can't,” Kris said, touching Adam's lip with a shaking finger. “What would I say? We just have to- we have to not do it again.”
But now that they'd done it, it was like the floodgates had opened. Any time the two of them were in the same place and Katy wasn't in attendance, there was a better than fifty-percent chance that they would end up in a tiny room or closet, leaving marks and bruises on each other. And when Adam sent a dirty text to Kris after one of their encounters, that started a new tradition.
After a couple of months, Adam broke things off with Drake for the last time. They'd never been exclusive, but lately he'd started to feel, whenever they had sex, like he was cheating and even though it was an absurd thought – Kris was married, for fuck's sake – he couldn't shake it.
A few more months passed and they'd gone from stealing accidental moments together to actually arranging meetings. Kris's blowjobs improved and Adam once spent an entire night having his dick sucked, Kris taking him all the way down and keeping him there, backing off again and again when Adam had been close to coming. Kris hadn't been able to speak for a couple of hours, afterwards.
On Adam's birthday, Kris called him and talked him through a shivering, mind-blowing orgasm.
And sometimes Adam thought about Katy and what he was doing to her, but then he would see Kris and it would all fall away to the back of his mind. When Katy was actually around – always in a group at a party, though, never the three of them alone – he and Kris were just friends again. There was, surprisingly, a lot about their relationship that didn't change. Sometimes, when Kris called him, it was just to talk about music or something in his life.
It all came crashing down on an otherwise beautiful day. He was doing an interview with Laura from Dish of Salt and she asked him, “And are you seeing anyone right now?”
And his mouth had opened and he'd been within a breath of saying 'Kris' when he choked on the word. He turned it into a cough and then said, smoothly, “Not seriously. I'm trying to date around a little.”
The interview moved on from there, but Adam didn't. He'd managed, all this time, to avoid thinking about what he was doing. Despite everything he'd accomplished, he was right back in the closet with a relationship that he couldn't breathe a word about. A relationship that was only as real as a whisper in the dark.
He was a secret. A dirty gay secret.
When he called Kris and explained that, explained that he couldn't do this, he knew that Kris- he knew Kris would understand. “I just can't- fuck it, Kris, I can't live a lie,” he said.
“I didn't- I wasn't thinking,” Kris replied, his voice hoarse. “You're right. Of course, you're right. It's not fair at all. I'm-”
“It's not your fault,” Adam said, and he was so glad that he'd done this over the phone, because all he wanted to do was gather Kris close and kiss him until he was happy again. “We both stopped thinking.”
“Yeah,” Kris said. He chuckled, sounding exhausted. “We both became exactly what we never wanted to be, didn't we?”
It was almost surprising to him that it worked. That the next time they saw each other, the closest they came was a tight hug that lingered for maybe a moment or two longer than it should. It was Kris that made it work; Kris that pulled away in time and kept just enough distance between them. Their friendship stayed intact and, sometimes, he could almost forget the months when they'd gone crazy over each other, almost forget how it felt to trace his hands over Kris's body, forget the taste of his cock, and the sweet way he smiled afterward as though he'd never been more content.
After all, Adam had never told anyone, not even his mom. In a lot of ways, it was like it had never happened.
Except... sometimes Kris's eyes would meet his and there would be a spark of heat, quickly extinguished. Sometimes, when Kris touched him, electricity would zing under his skin. And, late at night, the memories would flood back when Adam touched himself.
On Kris's twenty-sixth birthday, Adam wasn't even in the country. He phoned anyway, and when Kris answered, he sounded half-asleep.
“Happy birthday,” he said and Kris made a happy, muffled sound that made Adam's cock jump. He pressed his hand down on it hard.
“Thought you weren't going to make it,” Kris said and Adam looked at the nearest clock and did the math – less than two hours until it wasn't Kris's birthday anymore.
“Sorry,” Adam said and he would swear that he could hear Kris's shrug.
“Glad you called,” he said. There was a long silence, and then, softly, “Miss you.”
Adam closed his eyes, kept his breathing even. “Miss you, too.”
“Adam-”
And Kris's voice was far too welcoming and tender. Too much like everything that Adam had ever wanted. “Gotta go. Lots to do. See you soon.” And he disconnected the call before he could tell Kris that he'd made a mistake. Before he could offer to be Kris's secret again.
He brought himself off on the memory of Kris's voice.
More time passed – his next album came out, along with Kris's and Allison's. He did try dating again, but either he found out that the guy was only interested in his fame or he was the one thinking of something else, Kris's moans and needy whimpers filling up his head no matter how loud the guy he's with was shouting.
It was nearly winter when Allison called him, in complete shock.
“Did you hear?” she asked. “He never breathed a word to me.”
“Hear what?” Adam asked, zipping up his boot. Much as he loved her, Allison sometimes freaked out over silly things, so he was going to wait before he got worried.
“It's everywhere online,” she said. “It's Kris-”
“Something happened to Kris?” he interrupted and he was running to find his laptop and turn it on. “Is he okay? Fuck, is he-”
“Divorce,” she said, and Adam froze. “Kris and Katy are getting a divorce. Everyone's talking about it, but Kris didn't say anything to me when I saw him last month.”
“It might be a rumor,” Adam said, suddenly feeling the need to sit down. And, handily, there was his couch. “Who exactly is reporting it?”
“Everyone,” she said. “I... I don't think it's a rumor.”
“Look, I'm gonna give Kris a call, okay,” Adam said and Allison was willing to go with that. So he hung up, but it took him a few minutes before he could try dialing Kris's number. There was a thick feeling of something sour in his stomach and it was hard for him to get enough air to breathe.
Finally, he hit Kris on speed dial and then he just waited. Kris answered in three rings, with a weary, “Hey, Adam, I wish I had time to talk, but I really don't. Talk to you later, okay?”
And then he was gone. Adam stared at the phone for a while. Kris hadn't ever hung up on him before. And that... that probably meant-
That probably meant that it was true. He went online and... yeah, Allison was right. It really was everywhere, including the most reputable news sites, and no one was reporting it as anything but fact.
He went over to Kris's apartment – it wasn't until he was standing in front of the building that he realized he hadn't been there since Kris's twenty-fifth birthday – and Katy answered the door. She looked exhausted and tiny, and she was still wearing her wedding ring.
“Are you here to gloat?” she asked, holding onto the door like she needed its help to stand.
“I don't- I don't understand,” Adam said, and she flinched away when he reached out for her.
“Isn't he with you?” she asked. When he shook his head, her hand lifted up to cover her mouth and he couldn't tell what her expression meant, but she was letting him inside now. The inside of the apartment was filled with boxes and Katy waved at them with a tired hand. “I'm almost all packed up.”
“What- what happened?” Adam asked. Katy shrugged and sat down on one of the boxes, crossing her legs. Adam leaned against the wall, noticing that either everything of Kris's was boxed up, too, or it was already gone.
“Ever since... ever since that night, we've been fighting,” she said, rubbing her hand against the back of her neck. “Mostly about little things – like whether or not the living room is clean enough and other stupid things like that, but more and more, we started fighting about the big things, too. I haven't... I haven't made much of a splash in Hollywood, so I was kinda hoping that we could go back to Arkansas while he worked on the next album. He said that I could, if I wanted to, but that he needed to be in L.A. And then... three weeks ago when I came home, he had a packet with him. Divorce papers, all drawn up. So we spent the last three weeks arguing about those. I finally... I signed them last Friday. I guess it didn't hit the news until today.”
“I'm so sorry,” Adam said, crouching down next to her.
“He really isn't with you?” she asked, her eyes bright and shining. Adam shook his head.
“I thought- all this time, I was sure that it was because of you,” she said. “Now... now, I don't know why. It was easier when I had someone to blame.”
“I don't know,” Adam said. He couldn't be sure how much what he and Kris had done had contributed to this, though it sure hadn't helped. “Maybe it is because of me. Everything's kinda gotten screwed around. If I'd known- if I'd known it would end like this, I never would have said yes.”
“Yeah, I got that one wrong,” Katy said, a wry twist to her lips. “I- I think I mentioned that night that the reason Kris and I broke up that one time was so that I could...”
“Sow wild oats?” Adam finished.
“Yeah.” She nodded. “There was this guy. He was the same age as me and I thought he was so gorgeous. And Kris was the only guy I'd ever really dated, so I was wondering if maybe... maybe he wasn't what I really needed. We broke up and I got with the other guy and- it wasn't enough. We only went out a few times before it fizzled. And then Kris came by, drove in from college, and he kissed me and I remembered why I'd wanted him to begin with. That was the moment that I realized I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him,” she said and she was trying so hard not to cry and he reached out and wrapped his arms around her.
“I miss him,” she said, her voice harsh with the effort of not crying. “But I've been missing him for months.”
The next day, Kris called him and they talked about everything except Katy and why he might have divorced her. Again, despite Adam's fears, it was still easy to talk to Kris, to fade into their normal friendship. Phone calls and texts flowed easily between them and Adam stopped worrying so much.
Two months later, there was a knock at his door and when he answered it, Kris was there with a serious look on his face. It was the first time they'd been face-to-face since the divorce and not seeing a ring on Kris's finger was weird. Even more strange was the way Kris hovered on the doorstep, as though he wasn't quite sure what he was doing there.
“You were right,” Kris said. Adam opened his mouth to ask, but Kris kept on going. “You deserved better. You both deserved better.”
“What are-”
“I'm asking you out,” Kris said, tucking his hands in his pockets. And that was so unexpected that Adam just stared at him, mouth agape. “No strings. No promises – at least not yet. No secrets.” Kris smiled at him, looking young and sincere. “We can go wherever you want, so it can be just as public as you want it to be.”
And there was... so much to say, so it was really pathetic that Adam could only come up with, “What?” Then he took a deep breath, trying to force Kris's offer into something he understood. “You're coming out?”
Kris shrugged. “I guess?”
“Okay, what the fuck have you been doing the last two months?” Adam asked. Which was a pretty good question, actually, something that he could be proud of asking. Kris had kinda disappeared after all, and though he'd called Adam often enough, the most he would say about what he was doing was that he was working on a lot of stuff.
“I did a lot of praying,” Kris said, with a quicksilver smile. “Talked to some people who know how to keep secrets. Figured out what to do without Katy in my life.”
“And you came here,” Adam said. He rubbed at his face. “Shit. I really need to apologize to her.”
“I dropped by Arkansas, actually, before I came here,” Kris said, as though it was as easy as going down the block, and that was all he offered on the subject. “And- it's really not your fault, Adam. I think- I think it would have happened without you. It just would have taken longer.”
“And you want to ask me out?” Adam asked. He thought he might be feeling a little light-headed.
“On a date, yeah,” Kris said. “If you're free.”
“I don't know if this is a good idea,” Adam said. “Your fans aren't going to see it coming. People are going to-”
“It's a risk,” Kris said, stepping forward and placing a quieting finger over Adam's lips. He grinned. “But I kinda think you're worth it.”
And Adam couldn't help himself. He reached out and yanked Kris close and they were kissing. Right there on his doorstep, in the middle of the day. He pulled Kris inside the house, closing the door behind them, then he pushed Kris up against the wall and started tearing his clothes off and, well.
Afterwards, Kris cuddled up near him on the floor and sighed, though he didn't sound unhappy.
“I had a plan,” Kris said, rubbing his palm over Adam's nipple. “It involved dating and kissing and not having sex the second I saw you again.”
“That's a stupid plan,” Adam said, and the floor was actually really uncomfortable, but he wasn't sure that he had the strength to stand up. “What are dates for? Getting to know someone. We already know each other.”
Kris snorted, and pressed a soft kiss against Adam's chest. “Well, the offer's open. It's up to you.”
“The Grammys are coming up soon,” Adam said, thoughtfully. “We could go to that.”
“You want me to come out at the Grammys,” Kris said. Adam glanced down at him and, yeah, he was more amused than anything else. “You think big.”
“Best way to get what you want,” Adam said firmly, touching Kris's cheek, though that wasn't true because... he'd never dreamed this big. He'd never imagined that anything like this could happen.
“Okay,” Kris agreed, sealing it with a soft kiss. “And I'll even let you dress me.”
“Let?” Adam asked, with a chuckle. “Don't try to pretend that you don't want it.”
Kris smiled at him, luminous and happy. “No more pretending.” And they were kissing again and Adam never, ever wanted to stop.
~end~
Summary: Plans backfire, emotions get messy, and sometimes we become what we hate most.
Pairings: Kris/Adam; Adam/Katy; Kris/Katy
Rating: NC-17; Sexual Content
Notes: Written for the
ontd_ai kink meme. Prompt: Adam/Kris/Katy. Katy makes Adam a trade. Adam can take Kris’s (guy) virginity if Katy gets to take Adam’s (girl) virginity. A night for the ages ensues. Your choice about reasons/consequences.planning special surprise for kris's 25th. Wanna help out?
When Adam got the text from Katy, he didn't really think anything of it. It seemed sweet, exactly the sort of thoughtfulness that made Kris and Katy's marriage work – they never seemed clingy, but did very nice things for each other when important events happened. So he texted back of course i would. Just let me know how and went on with his day.
She texted him a time for a meet-up and named the place as her L.A. apartment with Kris – she'd planned carefully then, picking a time when Kris would be out at meetings and Adam was free. He briefly wondered how she knew his schedule so well and then he scolded himself for being silly. He'd told Kris. Of course, she knew.
When she answered the door, it was obvious right away that she was nervous. When he heard her proposal, he understood why.
“You want me to fuck Kris,” Adam repeated. “Your husband. That Kris.”
“For his birthday,” she said, her voice slightly tight and her smile just a touch fake. She probably thought she was successfully selling it but there was definitely something wrong here. “But... to make it fair and to make him feel better, you should... do me, too.”
“I don't do girls,” he said but his head was miles away, giving himself permission to take Kris's shirt off, undo his pants, lick and suck and- he shivered.
“You want my husband,” Katy said evenly. Adam only barely kept himself from flinching at how matter-of-fact she sounded. “And part of him wants you. But he's a good man. If you sleep with me, too, then he won't feel like it's adultery. It'll probably easier for him if I go first.”
So that Kris gets to have Adam second and it feels even less like he cheated. There's a coldness in her deal that Adam hadn't realized she was capable of but... he gives her a long look and she stares back, determined. Maybe it didn't exist before Idol, before Kris had met Adam.
Adam bit his lip and he wondered if this could possibly be worth it – a night with Kris was something a part of him had wanted ever since Hollywood Week. But one where they were watched with possessive eyes, where he knew that it was only supposed to be a one-time thing to make Kris 'get over' Adam... and it might. Doing this might drive Kris away from him forever. He closed his eyes and remembered the last time he'd seen Kris – they'd hugged and talked about nothing much important and Kris's hand had lingered on his arm.
“It's a limited time offer,” Katy said, and his eyes snapped open again. Now, he could see the brittleness in her and she was probably worrying, too. Maybe scared that doing this could her lose Kris but more scared... more scared that not doing this would make her lose Kris even more surely.
“Okay,” Adam said. She took in a tiny, lost breath and maybe even she hadn't known whether or not this was the right direction to go, but now that he'd agreed, now that he'd let himself thinking about touching Kris, he couldn't take it back. “Okay, it's a deal.”
So that was how, two months later, he'd ended up at the Allens' place, waiting for them to get back from dinner. He'd made an appearance at Kris's birthday lunch, an industry-based event that Kris had been miserable at, so he was glad that he was going to get to wish Kris 'happy birthday' again, even if the circumstances...
He was just hoping that this wouldn't end up being a huge mistake.
Katy had told him to wait in the bedroom, but when they didn't show up at eight, he got restless and he was actually in the little kitchenette scrounging for a snack when they stumbled in. Katy was holding her strappy high heels in one hand and as soon as she was through the door, she and Kris were kissing, his hands tangled in her long blonde hair. Kris had backed up against the door, closing it with a muted thud, and Adam couldn't see where Katy's other hand was. Funny, all this time and he'd never, ever been jealous of Katy but now-
He'd never seen them like this.
He must have made a sound because suddenly Kris pulled away from Katy and was looking directly at him. Kris looked like he was slightly tipsy, but not even close to drunk and he was clearly confused, so Katy had really meant the 'surprise' part.
“Adam?” Kris asked, hesitantly, like he wasn't even sure that Adam was really there. “Did- did I invite you over? I mean-” And it was striking the way he'd just completely stopped touching Katy the second he'd noticed that Adam was there. For the first time, Adam had to wonder if Katy had had reason to be worried. “-not that you need an invitation. I just wasn't expecting you.”
“Katy invited me,” Adam said, taking a step out of the kitchenette and toward the pair of them. Katy put her shoes down on the table next to the front door and she looked a little upset. Maybe she'd been planning on saying something on the way to the bedroom. “She thought it would be fun.”
Kris's lips parted and his forehead crinkled up and he glanced between Katy and Adam with a look on his face like they were the latest Times crossword. “But... Katy, you said-”
“I said that I wanted tonight to be special,” Katy said. Adam didn't know her nervous tics as well as he did Kris's, but her fingers were knotted together tight, the knuckles white. “I thought Adam could be part of it.”
“I don't- is this a joke?” Kris backed up further, flattening himself against the door. “It's... it's not funny.”
And Adam was just about ready to agree with Kris and laugh it all off when Katy strode up to him, face determined, and yanked him down against her mouth. Adam's mouth had already been slightly open and Katy wasn't shy about sticking her tongue straight in. Adam wanted to pull away, but she was so damn tiny and he just froze. After a long, awkward moment, she let him go and he brushed nerveless fingers down the front of his shirt, taking a shaky step backward. Katy turned to face Kris and Adam turned his head that way, too – Kris didn't look upset anymore, but he was clearly still baffled and not at all on board Katy's crazy threesome train.
Then Katy went to Kris and kissed him, and Adam could see their mouths moving and Kris's hand reached up to cup Katy's cheek. When she pulled away, there was a wet noise and a tiny strand of saliva that lingered for a moment, and then Kris touched his mouth, his nose wrinkling.
“I said that there'd be something special in bed tonight,” Katy said, her hand resting on Kris's arm – Adam could see her thumb rubbing in a circle, trying to soothe. “And that's Adam.”
“He's not a thing,” Kris said, quietly, and he wasn't looking at either of them. Katy shot Adam a panicked look over her shoulder and he just shrugged. It was all in Kris's hands now and Adam wasn't going to force him into anything that he didn't want. “Katy, why?”
“I see the way he looks at you,” she said. “And I... I see the way you look at him.” Kris flinched like she'd just landed a body blow, and then he nodded. “This way- this way nobody does anything wrong.”
“You think I'll cheat on you,” Kris said. He looked up to meet Katy's gaze and Adam could see his eyes over Katy's shoulder and he looked... he looked betrayed. Adam's fists clenched and he hadn't seen this coming, but he should have and all he wanted- all he wanted was to know that Kris was going to forgive him for this. “You think- what? That one day I'll just... snap and jump Adam? Beg him to let me blow him? Ask for his-”
“Kris,” Adam said, because Katy was curling up in on herself – he could see the tension in her back and shoulders, and she'd moved away from Kris, her hands hanging limp at her sides. “Stop.”
And he did, he stopped mid-sentence. Then he looked over Katy's shoulder and met Adam's eyes and... the chill softened and the tiniest hint of a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Why'd you say yes, Adam?”
“Why do you think?” Adam asked and he was laying it all out there, if Kris was paying attention. Kris's tongue flickered out to wet his lips and he breathed in sharply.
“What was the plan, exactly?” Kris asked, turning his attention back to Katy. “You had a plan, right? What was it, honey?”
“It was... kinda a trade,” Katy said, and her voice got clearer and stronger as she continued. “I was going to be Adam's first, maybe only, girl and then he was going to be your only guy. Because- Kris, you remember your senior year of high school?”
“Yeah,” Kris said, and his mouth tightened.
“I just needed to get it out of my system, needed to sow some wild oats,” Katy said and she was really laying it on thick now, selling the hell out of her pitch. “But you didn't. You told me that. You didn't sleep with anyone that year we were separated-”
“You were the only one I ever wanted,” Kris said and Katy laughed, gently. Adam shifted on his feet, wishing that he was doing something else – anything else – right now.
“We both know that's not true,” she said. “I'm not stupid, Kris. Please don't pretend that I'm stupid.”
“I chose you, Katy,” Kris said, taking a step toward her. He reached out and his fingers brushed against her hair. “I went to college and I looked at... at guys, okay, yeah. But I didn't do anything with them, because I wanted you more than any of them.”
“Do- do you still want me the most?” Katy asked, her voice breaking. And then it happened – Kris looked away from her, his eyes going to Adam's for just a moment before he cast them downward, his lips pressing together. In its silence, it was louder than any words could be. And Katy took a step back, away from Kris. “That's what I thought.”
“What made you- when did you decide to do this?” Kris asked. He'd closed his eyes and he was just... standing there, trembling slightly. “When did you decide that I would cheat on you if you didn't do this?”
“Three months ago,” Katy said, and Adam thought back, because that was a month before she'd contacted him. The month before that he'd been-
“Adam's last night on tour,” Kris said. “When we went to see him close it out at Staples.”
“You two hadn't seen each other for, I don't know, maybe two months,” Katy said and – yeah, that was about right. “You hugged for what seemed like forever and neither of you noticed that I was standing there and Kris said-”
“That I'd never missed anyone so much in my life,” Kris finished for her and now his voice was shaky, too, and Adam wasn't the most experienced threesome guy ever, but it really wasn't supposed to go this way.
“Did you really mean that, Kris?” Katy asked. She wrapped her arms around herself, but Adam didn't think that she was feeling a physical cold. “Did you miss him more than you've ever missed me?”
“That's not a fair question,” Kris whispered. And Adam couldn't- he couldn't just stand there, so he moved past Katy and he pressed his hand against Kris's chest. Kris's eyelids popped open and Kris was staring up at him, and his eyes looked practically black in this light.
“Did you?” Adam asked. Kris's eyes lowered to Adam's mouth and he was pushing back, slightly, against Adam's hand. “Did you miss me more?”
Kris made a strangled noise in the back of his throat and, just like Katy had earlier, he hauled Adam down for a kiss. This time, though, Adam melted against Kris's mouth, parting his lips and darting his tongue out to touch Kris's. Kris kissed him back, open-mouthed, one hand sliding around to the back of Adam's neck and the other reaching down to tug at the top of Adam's pants as Kris deepened the kiss. Adam slipped his hand out from between their bodies and pressed it against the small of Kris's back and- despite the argument, Kris was hard against him.
With a rough sob, Kris broke away from him, turning his back on both of them, his shoulders shaking. Adam reached out, his hand just shy of touching Kris's shoulder.
Kris's slow, heaving breaths seemed to fill the room, choking out the rest of the air.
“I'm sorry,” Adam said, because he should have known better. He did know better. Kris had been off-limits the entire time they'd known each other, for good reason. Just because Katy had suffered some temporary insanity had been no excuse for Adam to play along. “I'll just... I'll get out of here.”
He headed toward the door, shooting a look at Katy, who was... so completely wrecked looking that he couldn't even be mad at her, no matter how much easier that would make this. He turned the knob and-
“Wait.”
Adam froze at the sound of Kris's voice. He twisted around to face them, and Katy was staring at Kris, who was looking at some place in between both of them.
“Katy's right,” Kris said. He reached down and started unbuttoning his shirt, starting at the bottom. Adam couldn't help it – his eyes went to the sliver of stomach that Kris had revealed and, as Kris moved upward, undoing each button in turn, Adam's gaze followed. Kris shrugged off the shirt and it fell into a crumpled heap at his feet. “We have to do this now that it's been started. Otherwise, it's always going to be there, every time that we touch.”
He reached down to the button on his pants and it was Adam's turn to ask Kris to wait. Adam didn't look at Katy this time, just went to Kris and folded himself down onto his knees. “Let me,” he said and Kris took his hands away, lightly resting them on Adam's shoulders.
He stared up at Kris, practically daring him to look away – Kris met his challenge, and Adam kept up the eye-contact as he unbuttoned Kris's pants and slid down the zipper. He slid Kris's slacks down to mid-thigh and he could see black boxer-briefs at the edge of his vision.
“This for Katy's benefit?” Adam asked, rubbing the material between his thumb and index finger. “Because she said she had something special planned.”
Kris nodded, ever so slightly. Adam slid his hand to see if – yeah, they were the kind that snapped open for easy access. Popping open the snap was unnaturally loud in their artificial silence and Kris's eyes widened, his fingers tightening on Adam's shoulders. Adam leaned forward, finally breaking eye-contact with Kris as he opened the flap and licked up the length of Kris's dick. He drew it out and lazily ran his hand up and down a few times. He'd seen Kris naked a lot over the past couple of years, but pretty much always in the middle of changing clothes. Not like this. He pressed a soft, lingering kiss to the head of Kris's cock, a little extra hello.
“Oh, god.”
Adam jerked in surprise, since women's voices didn't tend to feature in his sex – he'd actually... he'd forgotten that Katy was there. He huffed out a frustrated breath and Kris's cock twitched against his mouth. So he pursed his lips and blew out a gentle stream of air and Kris actually quivered all over. He considered making Kris come right here and now, but Kris deserved better than a quick blow job used to prove a point, so when he did start licking, he kept it soft and light. Besides, Kris had a cock that was worth exploring. Adam flicked his tongue around the flared head and had to reach up to brace Kris when he started to sway. He wrapped his arm around Kris's hips and pulled him in close, sucking Kris's balls into his mouth and rolling them around a bit with his tongue.
Kris was starting to make noises, tiny stifled whimpers that were hitting Adam in all the right places. Adam let Kris's balls slip back out of his mouth, his tongue making a brief detour to the skin directly underneath... but Kris wouldn't be ready for that yet, so he licked his way back up Kris's cock, doing his best to find any quirky hot spots that Kris had. He slid his lips over the head of Kris's cock and then kept going all the way down, not stopping until his nose hit Kris's belly.
He stayed until Kris's hips started jerking against him erratically, swallowing as Kris came in his mouth. He sucked lightly through the pulses, until Kris started to try to weakly push him away, and then he pulled off, giving Kris's cock one last lick goodbye.
He glanced up to assess the situation: Kris's mouth had dropped and he was practically panting, his eyes half-closed, and his dick was soft and used. His hands were still clutching Adam's shoulders and his face was shining with sweat. In one graceful motion, Adam stood, his hands gliding up Kris's body.
Kris focused on him and then smiled. “Where you going?” he asked, a hint of a pout in his voice.
“Oh, don't worry, that's not the end,” Adam said, ruffling his fingers through Kris's hair, then stroking down over the smooth skin of Kris's back. “Besides, it's your turn to set the rules. It is your birthday.” He leaned closer, whispered in Kris's ear. “And I'm your present.” Kris shivered and Adam licked at Kris's neck, not wanting to leave marks. “We'll do whatever you what.”
Kris froze for a second when Adam said 'we' and then he relaxed, nodding. “Okay. That's... okay.” And that was... that was one of the things about Kris that always impressed Adam, how easily he adjusted to any situation.
Kris pulled away from Adam and Adam reluctantly let go and his gaze followed Kris's over to where Katy was. Kris opened his arms and she came running, hitting him hard enough that he swayed where he stood. She buried her face in Kris's shoulder, saying something that Adam couldn't make out.
“It's going to be fine, honey,” Kris said, his hands stroking up and down Katy's back. “We're going to follow your game plan and see if the play pans out, all right?”
“All right,” Katy said, barely loud enough for Adam to hear.
“What happens next?” Kris asked. Katy lifted up her mouth to Kris's ear and whispered something to him, and he nodded slowly – Adam could see him lick his lips and Adam felt a sudden, sharp desire to suck Kris's lower lip into his mouth and suck until it was fat and swollen. Kris was unhooking Katy's dress and lowering the zipper and then she stepped backward, letting the dress fall down to the floor, the wash of crimson fabric like a bloodstain on the white carpet. She was wearing black underneath and she looked even smaller without her clothes on.
“Adam,” Katy said, and she seemed much calmer now, though she was slightly flushed. “We should probably go into the bedroom.”
“No,” Adam said, and he could do this, he'd decided. It was the same as any other part and he'd done enough with girls to know that it wasn't repulsive, just not his preference. “Not yet.”
He reached forward and encircled her wrist with his hand and drew her over to the couch, keeping his gaze on her and on their destination, because he wasn't sure he could do this if he kept looking at Kris. He sat down on the couch and pulled her on top of him, and this time when he kissed her, he threw himself into the role. Because he'd decided to view tonight as a gift, no matter what happened, and that meant that Katy deserved the biggest 'thank you' in the world.
She made a little shocked noise when he undid her bra with one hand and he kissed it into a full-blown moan. Her hands were small but warm, slipping under his shirt to touch him, and she kept pressing hot kisses against his neck. She had on diamond-drop earrings and a thin gold-cord necklace, but they didn't seem like they were going to get in the way, so Adam didn't bother getting them off her. He slid his hand under her ass and licked at her breasts and her hard pink nipples until she was asking him for more in a tiny voice.
He could hear Kris breathing unevenly, somewhere behind him.
Adam slid his hand down inside her panties – he'd forgotten that girls got so wet – and he rubbed his fingers against her clit, pressing and exploring until she was shuddering out a release.
He brushed a kiss against Katy's cheek and said to her, “I put a condom in my back pocket, just in case I needed it in a hurry – are you feeling ready?”
“Yeah,” she murmured, and she wiggled out of her panties, and Adam slid the condom packet out of his back pocket and opened up his pants. Katy took the condom from him and rolled it down on him, biting down on her lip in concentration. It was oddly adorable and he brushed a fond hand over her head, fingers catching a little in her hair. She positioned herself over him and then hesitated for a moment.
“I know,” Adam said, stroking a reassuring hand over her hip. “You'll want to go slow.”
She hissed as she lowered herself onto him and he let himself feel the difference – he'd done a few things with girls back when he was a kid, but he'd never done this. It was like fucking, but it felt... muted. Softer. Kinda like eating cotton candy instead of a steak. He let her set the pace, his hand on her hip only to support her, not guide her.
When it looked like she needed it, he pressed his hands against her again, lightly pinching her nipples and reaching down to stroke her until another climax shook her body, tightening her around him in rippling waves. After she was done, she kissed him softly and asked if he was close.
“Don't take it personally,” Adam said, because he was definitely hard and her rocking and wiggling had kept him that way but-
“It's not what you want.” And Kris's voice was in his ear and his hand was on Adam's shoulder. Adam's hips jerked up involuntarily and his mouth opened in a gasp. He turned his head and Kris had one knee up on the couch next to them, and Adam couldn't read his face at all. And he couldn't help it – he reached out and wrapped his arm around Kris's waist, tugging him closer. Kris leaned forward and they were kissing and he felt Kris's hand brushing against Adam's cock, feeling the place where it connected with Katy's body.
Kris broke the kiss and Adam had to lean back just to breathe. He watched as Kris and Katy kissed, lusty and dirty, and Kris's fingers were touching her now, only occasionally slipping off to brush against Adam's cock. Then Kris pulled away from her and he was ducking down and- his mouth replaced his fingers, and he was licking at Adam and Katy, and Adam had gone from being forever five steps away from orgasm to half a breath away. He couldn't really see what Kris was doing, but he could feel Kris's mouth, his tongue, right at the base of his cock.
He tangled his hand in Kris's short hair and just held on, biting down on his lip to keep from saying anything stupid as he emptied himself into the condom. He leaned forward to brush a kiss against Katy's mouth, and he whispered, “Thank you.” She put her hand on the back of his neck and kissed him, harder and deeper, until he was afraid that she was bruising her mouth. When she pulled away, she didn't look up to meet his eyes. She lifted herself off and Adam took off the condom, tying it, and then he tucked himself back in his pants. When he looked up again, she and Kris were talking to each other, very quietly. They kissed, light and easy, and then Katy pulled away and headed toward Kris and Katy's bedroom.
Kris was still standing just close enough for Adam to reach, so he grabbed Kris's wrist and tugged him closer. In a way, Adam was glad that he'd had the edge taken off, because Kris was even more gorgeous like this than Adam had ever anticipated. “Everything okay?” Adam asked.
“Yeah,” Kris said, and he was staring down at where Adam was holding onto him.
“What-” Adam cleared his throat. “What do you want me to do?”
Kris reached his other hand down and lightly stroked over where Adam's fingers were wrapped around him, then he traced the lines of Adam's tattoo. There was a flash of color behind them and Adam glanced up to see Katy, dressed in pajamas, ducking out of her bedroom and into the guest room. Kris shifted slightly and Adam's attention went back to him immediately. He cupped Kris's cheek with his other hand and Kris leaned down for a kiss, and the sharp taste in Kris's mouth momentarily made Adam want to recoil, but he pushed past it, tongue exploring and tasting until only the taste of the kiss remained.
Kris's eyes were closed when Adam pulled away and he rubbed his thumb over Kris's lips, briefly dipping into the wet heat of his mouth. And Adam couldn't help it; he had to kiss Kris again, messy and lost.
“What do you want?” he asked again, against Kris's mouth.
“Everything.” Kris's hand pressed against Adam's stomach, right above his cock, and Adam shuddered. Kris's voice had gone deep, rumbling. “Give me everything.”
Too late, Adam couldn't help but think, but his only answer was to kiss Kris again, and then tug him off the couch. Everything that they needed for this was in the bedroom. He'd had plenty of time earlier to prepare, and to second-guess, and worry and hope. Once in the bedroom, Adam hesitated for a moment and then he shut the door behind them. Kris reached out to touch the hem of Adam's shirt.
“I can't believe you still have all your clothes on,” Kris said, toying with fabric. Adam reached down to cover Kris's hands with his own and Kris stilled, his gaze darting up to meet Adam's. His cheeks were flushed pink and Adam wanted- he wanted what he couldn't have, so he pushed it away and concentrated on what he could take, leaning down to brush his mouth against Kris's jawline.
“We'll fix that, don't worry,” Adam said, reaching over to tug Kris's pants down again. Kris was half-hard again, so it didn't look like Adam would have any problems making it good for him. “But I've got a plan of my own and it involves you taking your clothes off first.”
Kris kicked off his shoes – and he'd worn actual dress shoes for his night out with Katy – and Adam slid his pants and those black boxer-briefs all the way off, not being shy about caressing Kris's legs. Kris might be a small guy, but he was the furthest thing from weak. This time, Adam ignored Kris's cock, though he did brush a light hand over the curve of Kris's ass, enjoying the way it made Kris shiver.
“I want you on the bed,” Adam said and Kris nodded, biting at his lip. It might be a good idea for him to find something to put in Kris's mouth, just to save his mouth from getting chewed up. “Stomach down.”
Kris shot him a nervous look, but he still did what Adam had asked, though he turned his head to the side and kept his gaze on Adam. Adam picked up the bottle of massage oil that he'd left on the nightstand and uncapped it, pouring a generous amount into his hands. He put his hands on Kris's back and Kris let out a surprised huff of breath. Adam straddled Kris, which really was a better position to give a massage from anyway, and he started rubbing the oil into Kris's skin. It didn't take long before Kris was starting to relax underneath him, and Adam pressed soft kisses against Kris's shoulders – tasting the banana of the flavored oil – as he worked his way down.
He skipped Kris's ass and started working from his feet up, needing reach over once to add a little more oil. Kris's legs were well-muscled and Adam was pretty sure that an accurate sculpture of Kris could win handily against anything else that claimed to show the perfect male form. He licked the back of Kris's knee and heard Kris suppressing what sounded remarkably like a giggle. He explored further, but Kris kept silent, so Adam moved on and up.
Adam had been admiring Kris's ass for a long time. It had been hidden in baggy jeans for the first part of the show, but after they'd become roommates, he'd seen it now and again when Kris was changing. When Kris had asked him if the stylist was right in suggesting that Kris buy tighter jeans, Adam's answer had been a whole-hearted 'yes'. It was wonderful to finally get to knead and touch and stroke, and he was already thinking of how amazing it would feel to sink into Kris's tight heat.
He stroked his fingers across Kris's hole and the resulting flinch was smaller than he'd been expecting. He reached over to the nightstand and flailed around until he found the tube of lube that had managed to roll to the far end. It took him a little extra time to open it, his fingers slippery with the oil, but it would be better to do this the right way. He warmed up the lube in his hands and, this time, when he touched the ring of muscle, Kris only shifted slightly, already adjusting to the feeling.
Adam pressed one finger carefully into Kris, staying slow and easy. Kris muttered something that Adam couldn't make out, rolling his hips against the bed.
“Tell me if it's too much,” Adam said.
“It's okay,” Kris said and it would have seemed like a lukewarm endorsement, but Kris's face was drawn up in concentration, and his hands were clutching at the sheets, and his voice was low and thoughtful. “... probably could do more.”
Adam slipped a second finger in with the first and Kris rocked back into his touch, sighing.
“Thought about this,” Kris said, softly, and Adam couldn't tell at first whether or not he meant to say it out loud. His fingers were deep inside now, stretching Kris out. Adam kinda put them on autopilot, leaning closer to hear Kris's words. “Almost every night on the Idol tour, I used to wonder what it was like and I would... sometimes...” Kris's words drifted off a bit, his hips rolling back against Adam's hand. “I'd try to do this to myself, but it never felt right.”
Adam tried to blank out the mental image that Kris's words were drawing, but that was pretty much impossible. He wasn't sure which thought was better: Kris in his bunk on the bus, trying to stay quiet and needing to muffle himself as he pressed shaky fingers into his ass, or Kris on the hotel nights, letting himself be a little louder, spreading himself out on a bed and pretending that Adam was going to fuck him.
When he twisted his fingers around and finally found Kris's prostate, Kris jerked back against him hard, a sharp “Oh!” escaping him.
“Yeah,” Adam said sympathetically. “It's a lot harder to find that on your own.”
Kris didn't answer him, just pushed back against Adam's fingers, and his eagerness reminded Adam of how achingly hard he is – he knew that he should probably do a third finger, but he didn't- he wasn't sure if he could wait that long. Not when Kris was moving so smooth, catching the rhythm so easily.
Not even the cool drizzle of lube made him feel any less ready, so Adam wrapped a tight hand around the base of his cock as he eased his way inside. Even the initial push was less tight than he was expecting, with Kris so relaxed and welcoming. Adam braced a hand against the bed and just sank down, Kris's hot inner skin clinging to his cock like liquid silk. When he was all the way in, he licked at a tiny mole on Kris's shoulder, stroked his hands over Kris's slim hips, and tried to concentrate on anything except Kris's warmth surrounding him.
“How are you doing, baby?” he asked. Adam could see about a third of Kris's face from where he was, and Kris's mouth was slack, his eyes closed. Adam ran a smoothing hand up Kris's side and asked again.
“I don't-” Kris sighed, arching up against Adam's touch. “I never... never expected-” Kris huffed out another breath, sounding slightly frustrated. “I'm okay. I think. It feels...” He pressed himself up into Adam's hands with another light sigh.
“Shh, it's all right, you don't have to,” Adam said, petting at Kris's skin. That was close to perfect, too, soft and nearly unblemished. The slightest hint of a tan lent it a gorgeous golden tone and Kris still tasted like banana when Adam licked him.
Adam started to slide out- and Kris was reaching back and grabbing at his hip, with a lost little whimper. Adam stroked Kris's hand reassuringly, and thrust in. A small “oh” escaped Kris's lips when Adam pushed back in and Adam could feel him relaxing again. He might have to ask Kris, later, just what he'd been thinking there, how he could possibly have imagined that Adam was actually going to stop. If he could remember.
His strokes melted into each other, Adam's brain fuzzing out a bit. He managed to pull Kris up to his knees and wrap a hand around his cock and that was- that was good and it made Kris squirm even more and make sexy little noises and, really, it wasn't Adam's fault that he was nipping at Kris's skin and sucking hard enough to leave marks. Especially not when Kris responded so well, whimpering and whining and begging. Begging in soft, broken words that didn't even get close to being really dirty but hit Adam's gut like the filthiest porn that existed.
He held back long enough to feel Kris's cock jerk in his hand, feel the sticky hot strands shooting out, but then he had to let go, to lose himself inside Kris. He braced himself against the bed and it only took a few more stuttering thrusts before he was coming inside Kris, the slide of his cock becoming easier as his come slicked the way.
He managed to pull out before he collapsed, only landing partly on Kris. He reached down and pressed his fingers against Kris's hole, feeling how much looser and easier it was now and that's when the realization hit him.
He'd forgotten the fucking condom.
It wasn't- Kris wasn't really in danger, because Adam always always used a condom and he was pretty damn sure that he didn't have anything but... he never forgot. He'd never forgotten. He swallowed hard and his sleepiness was gone and he was hopping up out of the bed.
Kris rolled over, lazy and well-used. “You okay?” he asked. Adam nodded, grateful for his background in theater. Kris didn't need to share his freak-out, since it was too late to fix it anyway.
“Yeah, I just don't want to step on Katy's toes,” Adam said, and he didn't miss the introspective look that crossed Kris's face when he said Katy's name. “After-sex cuddling is really a 'wife' thing.”
“I guess,” Kris said. He seemed to realize that he was naked, because he was shifting and twisting until he was underneath the sheets. And... fuck, Adam had not wanted to make this awkward and stupid.
“This doesn't- this doesn't have to change anything,” he said, feeling lost and desperate, but doing his best not to sound that way. “One night only.”
“Birthday sex,” Kris said, his mouth twisting. Then he looked at Adam, really looked at him, and he smiled, that warm, friendly smile that he'd been wearing the very first time that they'd had a real conversation and Adam had realized that being from Arkansas hadn't meant that Kris was small-minded. “Adam... if you aren't my best friend, you're pretty close. We'll be fine.”
And, for a few weeks, that really seemed like it was true. They saw each other occasionally, talked on the phone a lot, and everything just seemed to settle back into place. Adam still had his on-and-off thing with Drake and he'd just started to relax about everything.
He'd like to be able to blame alcohol or pretend that he'd been in the middle of something with Drake when he'd had to leave for the party or anything external, really. But the truth was that it wasn't anyone's fault but his own.
The truth was that he'd been simmering under his skin since he'd first walked into the party and seen how closely Zac Efron and Kris were standing together, with Efron's hand on Kris's arm and both of them leaning in toward each other. Efron had yet to officially 'come out' as bisexual or anything else, but everyone knew that he did guys as well as girls and he was acting way too interested in someone who he damn well knew was taken.
... the irony of Adam's thoughts didn't escape him. Nor did the fact that he normally really liked Zac Efron but couldn't seem to currently work up an ounce of affection for him.
Adam circulated through the party, waiting for Kris to notice that he was there. Kris, though, seemed like he was too involved in his conversation with Efron to notice a bomb going off in front of him. The last straw came when Kris reached back, his hand brushing against Efron's shirt, possibly even touching his stomach.
Adam clapped a heavy hand on Kris's shoulder and even the brightness of Kris's smile as he turned and saw who it was didn't fix the ugly twist in the pit of his stomach. He said 'hello' to Efron and Kris with gritted teeth and then said, apologetically, that he really needed to talk to Kris alone about something.
He hustled Kris into the nearest empty room and shut the door behind them. Then he yanked Kris toward him and they were kissing, hard, all teeth and tongues and nothing fancy or sweet or pretty. He didn't have anything on him, so he ended up dropping to his knees and giving Kris a fast and dirty blowjob that tasted better than anything he'd ever put in his mouth. He pushed Kris's hand down onto his cock but then Kris was on his knees, and Adam hadn't even dreamed about that, and he was slow and amateur and Adam had to bite down on his lip until it bled, just to keep from screaming.
It was over in minutes and Kris was coughing a little, wiping come from his face.
Adam slid down against the door and pulled Kris into his lap, finally giving him the kiss he deserved, tender and aching. “I'm sorry,” he said, and they were both still dressed but so completely fucked.
Kris laughed and he sounded half-broken. “Never should have kissed you,” he said, but he leaned forward to do it again, lingering, his tongue licking at where Adam had bitten his own lip open.
“Are you-”
“I can't,” Kris said, touching Adam's lip with a shaking finger. “What would I say? We just have to- we have to not do it again.”
But now that they'd done it, it was like the floodgates had opened. Any time the two of them were in the same place and Katy wasn't in attendance, there was a better than fifty-percent chance that they would end up in a tiny room or closet, leaving marks and bruises on each other. And when Adam sent a dirty text to Kris after one of their encounters, that started a new tradition.
After a couple of months, Adam broke things off with Drake for the last time. They'd never been exclusive, but lately he'd started to feel, whenever they had sex, like he was cheating and even though it was an absurd thought – Kris was married, for fuck's sake – he couldn't shake it.
A few more months passed and they'd gone from stealing accidental moments together to actually arranging meetings. Kris's blowjobs improved and Adam once spent an entire night having his dick sucked, Kris taking him all the way down and keeping him there, backing off again and again when Adam had been close to coming. Kris hadn't been able to speak for a couple of hours, afterwards.
On Adam's birthday, Kris called him and talked him through a shivering, mind-blowing orgasm.
And sometimes Adam thought about Katy and what he was doing to her, but then he would see Kris and it would all fall away to the back of his mind. When Katy was actually around – always in a group at a party, though, never the three of them alone – he and Kris were just friends again. There was, surprisingly, a lot about their relationship that didn't change. Sometimes, when Kris called him, it was just to talk about music or something in his life.
It all came crashing down on an otherwise beautiful day. He was doing an interview with Laura from Dish of Salt and she asked him, “And are you seeing anyone right now?”
And his mouth had opened and he'd been within a breath of saying 'Kris' when he choked on the word. He turned it into a cough and then said, smoothly, “Not seriously. I'm trying to date around a little.”
The interview moved on from there, but Adam didn't. He'd managed, all this time, to avoid thinking about what he was doing. Despite everything he'd accomplished, he was right back in the closet with a relationship that he couldn't breathe a word about. A relationship that was only as real as a whisper in the dark.
He was a secret. A dirty gay secret.
When he called Kris and explained that, explained that he couldn't do this, he knew that Kris- he knew Kris would understand. “I just can't- fuck it, Kris, I can't live a lie,” he said.
“I didn't- I wasn't thinking,” Kris replied, his voice hoarse. “You're right. Of course, you're right. It's not fair at all. I'm-”
“It's not your fault,” Adam said, and he was so glad that he'd done this over the phone, because all he wanted to do was gather Kris close and kiss him until he was happy again. “We both stopped thinking.”
“Yeah,” Kris said. He chuckled, sounding exhausted. “We both became exactly what we never wanted to be, didn't we?”
It was almost surprising to him that it worked. That the next time they saw each other, the closest they came was a tight hug that lingered for maybe a moment or two longer than it should. It was Kris that made it work; Kris that pulled away in time and kept just enough distance between them. Their friendship stayed intact and, sometimes, he could almost forget the months when they'd gone crazy over each other, almost forget how it felt to trace his hands over Kris's body, forget the taste of his cock, and the sweet way he smiled afterward as though he'd never been more content.
After all, Adam had never told anyone, not even his mom. In a lot of ways, it was like it had never happened.
Except... sometimes Kris's eyes would meet his and there would be a spark of heat, quickly extinguished. Sometimes, when Kris touched him, electricity would zing under his skin. And, late at night, the memories would flood back when Adam touched himself.
On Kris's twenty-sixth birthday, Adam wasn't even in the country. He phoned anyway, and when Kris answered, he sounded half-asleep.
“Happy birthday,” he said and Kris made a happy, muffled sound that made Adam's cock jump. He pressed his hand down on it hard.
“Thought you weren't going to make it,” Kris said and Adam looked at the nearest clock and did the math – less than two hours until it wasn't Kris's birthday anymore.
“Sorry,” Adam said and he would swear that he could hear Kris's shrug.
“Glad you called,” he said. There was a long silence, and then, softly, “Miss you.”
Adam closed his eyes, kept his breathing even. “Miss you, too.”
“Adam-”
And Kris's voice was far too welcoming and tender. Too much like everything that Adam had ever wanted. “Gotta go. Lots to do. See you soon.” And he disconnected the call before he could tell Kris that he'd made a mistake. Before he could offer to be Kris's secret again.
He brought himself off on the memory of Kris's voice.
More time passed – his next album came out, along with Kris's and Allison's. He did try dating again, but either he found out that the guy was only interested in his fame or he was the one thinking of something else, Kris's moans and needy whimpers filling up his head no matter how loud the guy he's with was shouting.
It was nearly winter when Allison called him, in complete shock.
“Did you hear?” she asked. “He never breathed a word to me.”
“Hear what?” Adam asked, zipping up his boot. Much as he loved her, Allison sometimes freaked out over silly things, so he was going to wait before he got worried.
“It's everywhere online,” she said. “It's Kris-”
“Something happened to Kris?” he interrupted and he was running to find his laptop and turn it on. “Is he okay? Fuck, is he-”
“Divorce,” she said, and Adam froze. “Kris and Katy are getting a divorce. Everyone's talking about it, but Kris didn't say anything to me when I saw him last month.”
“It might be a rumor,” Adam said, suddenly feeling the need to sit down. And, handily, there was his couch. “Who exactly is reporting it?”
“Everyone,” she said. “I... I don't think it's a rumor.”
“Look, I'm gonna give Kris a call, okay,” Adam said and Allison was willing to go with that. So he hung up, but it took him a few minutes before he could try dialing Kris's number. There was a thick feeling of something sour in his stomach and it was hard for him to get enough air to breathe.
Finally, he hit Kris on speed dial and then he just waited. Kris answered in three rings, with a weary, “Hey, Adam, I wish I had time to talk, but I really don't. Talk to you later, okay?”
And then he was gone. Adam stared at the phone for a while. Kris hadn't ever hung up on him before. And that... that probably meant-
That probably meant that it was true. He went online and... yeah, Allison was right. It really was everywhere, including the most reputable news sites, and no one was reporting it as anything but fact.
He went over to Kris's apartment – it wasn't until he was standing in front of the building that he realized he hadn't been there since Kris's twenty-fifth birthday – and Katy answered the door. She looked exhausted and tiny, and she was still wearing her wedding ring.
“Are you here to gloat?” she asked, holding onto the door like she needed its help to stand.
“I don't- I don't understand,” Adam said, and she flinched away when he reached out for her.
“Isn't he with you?” she asked. When he shook his head, her hand lifted up to cover her mouth and he couldn't tell what her expression meant, but she was letting him inside now. The inside of the apartment was filled with boxes and Katy waved at them with a tired hand. “I'm almost all packed up.”
“What- what happened?” Adam asked. Katy shrugged and sat down on one of the boxes, crossing her legs. Adam leaned against the wall, noticing that either everything of Kris's was boxed up, too, or it was already gone.
“Ever since... ever since that night, we've been fighting,” she said, rubbing her hand against the back of her neck. “Mostly about little things – like whether or not the living room is clean enough and other stupid things like that, but more and more, we started fighting about the big things, too. I haven't... I haven't made much of a splash in Hollywood, so I was kinda hoping that we could go back to Arkansas while he worked on the next album. He said that I could, if I wanted to, but that he needed to be in L.A. And then... three weeks ago when I came home, he had a packet with him. Divorce papers, all drawn up. So we spent the last three weeks arguing about those. I finally... I signed them last Friday. I guess it didn't hit the news until today.”
“I'm so sorry,” Adam said, crouching down next to her.
“He really isn't with you?” she asked, her eyes bright and shining. Adam shook his head.
“I thought- all this time, I was sure that it was because of you,” she said. “Now... now, I don't know why. It was easier when I had someone to blame.”
“I don't know,” Adam said. He couldn't be sure how much what he and Kris had done had contributed to this, though it sure hadn't helped. “Maybe it is because of me. Everything's kinda gotten screwed around. If I'd known- if I'd known it would end like this, I never would have said yes.”
“Yeah, I got that one wrong,” Katy said, a wry twist to her lips. “I- I think I mentioned that night that the reason Kris and I broke up that one time was so that I could...”
“Sow wild oats?” Adam finished.
“Yeah.” She nodded. “There was this guy. He was the same age as me and I thought he was so gorgeous. And Kris was the only guy I'd ever really dated, so I was wondering if maybe... maybe he wasn't what I really needed. We broke up and I got with the other guy and- it wasn't enough. We only went out a few times before it fizzled. And then Kris came by, drove in from college, and he kissed me and I remembered why I'd wanted him to begin with. That was the moment that I realized I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him,” she said and she was trying so hard not to cry and he reached out and wrapped his arms around her.
“I miss him,” she said, her voice harsh with the effort of not crying. “But I've been missing him for months.”
The next day, Kris called him and they talked about everything except Katy and why he might have divorced her. Again, despite Adam's fears, it was still easy to talk to Kris, to fade into their normal friendship. Phone calls and texts flowed easily between them and Adam stopped worrying so much.
Two months later, there was a knock at his door and when he answered it, Kris was there with a serious look on his face. It was the first time they'd been face-to-face since the divorce and not seeing a ring on Kris's finger was weird. Even more strange was the way Kris hovered on the doorstep, as though he wasn't quite sure what he was doing there.
“You were right,” Kris said. Adam opened his mouth to ask, but Kris kept on going. “You deserved better. You both deserved better.”
“What are-”
“I'm asking you out,” Kris said, tucking his hands in his pockets. And that was so unexpected that Adam just stared at him, mouth agape. “No strings. No promises – at least not yet. No secrets.” Kris smiled at him, looking young and sincere. “We can go wherever you want, so it can be just as public as you want it to be.”
And there was... so much to say, so it was really pathetic that Adam could only come up with, “What?” Then he took a deep breath, trying to force Kris's offer into something he understood. “You're coming out?”
Kris shrugged. “I guess?”
“Okay, what the fuck have you been doing the last two months?” Adam asked. Which was a pretty good question, actually, something that he could be proud of asking. Kris had kinda disappeared after all, and though he'd called Adam often enough, the most he would say about what he was doing was that he was working on a lot of stuff.
“I did a lot of praying,” Kris said, with a quicksilver smile. “Talked to some people who know how to keep secrets. Figured out what to do without Katy in my life.”
“And you came here,” Adam said. He rubbed at his face. “Shit. I really need to apologize to her.”
“I dropped by Arkansas, actually, before I came here,” Kris said, as though it was as easy as going down the block, and that was all he offered on the subject. “And- it's really not your fault, Adam. I think- I think it would have happened without you. It just would have taken longer.”
“And you want to ask me out?” Adam asked. He thought he might be feeling a little light-headed.
“On a date, yeah,” Kris said. “If you're free.”
“I don't know if this is a good idea,” Adam said. “Your fans aren't going to see it coming. People are going to-”
“It's a risk,” Kris said, stepping forward and placing a quieting finger over Adam's lips. He grinned. “But I kinda think you're worth it.”
And Adam couldn't help himself. He reached out and yanked Kris close and they were kissing. Right there on his doorstep, in the middle of the day. He pulled Kris inside the house, closing the door behind them, then he pushed Kris up against the wall and started tearing his clothes off and, well.
Afterwards, Kris cuddled up near him on the floor and sighed, though he didn't sound unhappy.
“I had a plan,” Kris said, rubbing his palm over Adam's nipple. “It involved dating and kissing and not having sex the second I saw you again.”
“That's a stupid plan,” Adam said, and the floor was actually really uncomfortable, but he wasn't sure that he had the strength to stand up. “What are dates for? Getting to know someone. We already know each other.”
Kris snorted, and pressed a soft kiss against Adam's chest. “Well, the offer's open. It's up to you.”
“The Grammys are coming up soon,” Adam said, thoughtfully. “We could go to that.”
“You want me to come out at the Grammys,” Kris said. Adam glanced down at him and, yeah, he was more amused than anything else. “You think big.”
“Best way to get what you want,” Adam said firmly, touching Kris's cheek, though that wasn't true because... he'd never dreamed this big. He'd never imagined that anything like this could happen.
“Okay,” Kris agreed, sealing it with a soft kiss. “And I'll even let you dress me.”
“Let?” Adam asked, with a chuckle. “Don't try to pretend that you don't want it.”
Kris smiled at him, luminous and happy. “No more pretending.” And they were kissing again and Adam never, ever wanted to stop.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-08-21 01:16 am (UTC)