In which the full extent of my domestic uselessness is revealed:

[butterfly]

So, I fairly randomly received a turkey for Christmas. Someone knocked on my door and gave it to me.

I then tried to follow the instructions. It thawed in the fridge for three days, I washed it in cold water and removed the neck and giblets. Pre-heated the oven and...

The oven racks were not in the right places. I turned off the oven, spent several minutes trying to move the rack.

Failing, I called my mom. I attempted to follow her instructions regarding leverage and such. Failure again.

So, the turkey is now still in the roasting pan, but temporarily back in the freezer, as I fucking well give up. I spent over an hour trying to figure out how to move that rack.

Added to the 'burning broccoli' disaster of last week, I think that I've definitely remember why I don't cook. I suck at it. It doesn't work for me. Oven equipment has it in for me and I'm not feeling particularly cordial in return.

So, instead of messing around with that, I'm eating really easy stuff and watching The Life of Python. Eric Idle and Michael Palin were very cute when they were young. Plus, it's really funny. Right now, I'm watching the 'lost' German episode.

Comments

[jic]

For removing oven racks, I suggest first pulling the rack straight out until it stops, and then inspecting the rails to see what caused it to stop. Repeat if necessary.

Once you've found what keeps it from normally pulling all the way out and dropping on the open door, you can figure out how to circumvent the obstruction.

Not all ovens are the same (though most are), so it is within the realm of possibility that your mother's instructions didn't match your stove.

Alternatively, bring the bugger over here and we'll cook it up Friday night whilst we watch bloody movies!

[butterfly.livejournal.com]

The design of the stove is what prevents me from pulling it out.

Seriously, it has these triangle pointy things on the racks that are probably there to keep them from toppling over when they have things on them, but have made it impossible for me to figure out how to move them.

Interestingly enough, my mom's final suggestion, after everything we tried failed?

"Why don't you take it over to Jo's when you go over there next weekend?"

Should I be amused or scared that you're on the same wavelength as my mom?

[trepkos.livejournal.com]

Eric was the cutest....

[butterfly.livejournal.com]

His hair was so floppy and adorable. Very, very cute man.

[trepkos.livejournal.com]

The Pythons, and Led Zeppelin, both came to Jersey in the 70s, pythons to film and Led Zep on holiday. Different friends of mine had encounters with both of them, but not me!
Also, Nick Cave was seen here in Pizza Express!
Missed him too!

[jic]

*giggles*

So, what does your schedule look like this week?