Fic: Tagged for Observation
Mar. 29th, 2005 10:40 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
butterflyTitle: Tagged for Observation
Summary: Daniel just wants to make the world a better place.
Timeline: Set during Moebius (part 2). Follows directly after Bloody Hands.
Warnings: Very angsty. I mean, really very angsty.
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 belongs to (take a deep breath) MGM-UA, Worldwide Television, Showtime, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions, the Sci-Fi Channel and Stargate SG1 Prod. Ltd. Partnership.
"I'm sorry, Jack," Daniel said softly. But Jack hadn't heard him. Not the one that had just left his tent and definitely not the one that he was talking to.
Daniel glanced over to the corner of the tent, at his pack, battered but still there. The military really did make things to last. At least sometimes.
He wasn't aware of moving until he was already kneeling beside it. He had the right to do this. Normally, he waited until their anniversaries, but... today hadn't been the best day. He needed to remember why he was doing this.
He pulled out the tangle of dog tags and placed them on the floor of the tent.
One at a time.
He untangled one set from the pile.
Carter.
"Hey, Sam," Daniel said quietly. "Sorry that I was so horrible to that other you. She's... not so bad. Bright girl. She was probably a wonderful little fact-checker."
Daniel rubbed his finger over the face of the tag, wondering how long it would be before the letters started to fade. He couldn't quite remember. He couldn't remember a lot of things, these days.
"What have I been up to since the last time we chatted? A lot, really. We finished that new irrigation system. I don't think that I was too helpful. I tried not to be." Daniel swallowed hard and stopped for a moment. "Anyway, if we fucked up again, we might get another team down here. Another you. That would be a kick. Would you get along with yourself?"
Daniel swallowed again. It was too soon for him to do this. He should have waited. Carefully, he placed Sam's tags back on the ground.
And there was a line of blood along the front of one, now. From his hands. Daniel wiped his hands on his robes, picked up the tags and wiped them off. "God, Sam. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'll be more careful next time. I promise," he murmured softly. Or maybe he just thought it. He wasn't always that sure, these days.
He looked down at his hands and then wiped them on his robes again, checking and rewiping, until he was satisfied that he wouldn't rub off on anything important.
He reached out blindly, pulling the other two sets of tags free from each other, leaving one to lie in a pile.
He ran his finger along the raised letters.
Murray.
"Teal'c, old buddy. Long time, no see," Daniel said. "So, I killed you today. Again. This time, you asked me to. Does that make a difference?"
The tags fell from from his hands and he didn't bother trying to pick them up again. Teal'c had been so damn close to being Teal'c.
"He said that it would be an honor. How the hell could you do that to me, Teal'c?" Daniel said, his voice no louder than a whisper. "An honor to die? Because of the things that I told him he was capable of. Because he trusted me. Just... just the way all of you did."
He almost didn't reach for the last set of tags.
Jackson.
"I just want to believe that it was all worth it, in the end," Daniel whispered. His tags felt so light in his hand, while Jack's felt so heavy around his neck. "That I fixed things. That right now, Daniel Jackson is with his best friend, with his family. I don't care about the rest of it anymore. Would you hate me for that, Daniel Jackson? That I... that we could become this kind of man?"
Slowly, he gathered up Teal'c's and Sam's tags, wrapping them around his own and placing them back inside the pack.
He reached inside his robes, touched Jack's tags softly.
Please, let the future be worth this.
~fin~
Summary: Daniel just wants to make the world a better place.
Timeline: Set during Moebius (part 2). Follows directly after Bloody Hands.
Warnings: Very angsty. I mean, really very angsty.
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 belongs to (take a deep breath) MGM-UA, Worldwide Television, Showtime, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions, the Sci-Fi Channel and Stargate SG1 Prod. Ltd. Partnership.
"I'm sorry, Jack," Daniel said softly. But Jack hadn't heard him. Not the one that had just left his tent and definitely not the one that he was talking to.
Daniel glanced over to the corner of the tent, at his pack, battered but still there. The military really did make things to last. At least sometimes.
He wasn't aware of moving until he was already kneeling beside it. He had the right to do this. Normally, he waited until their anniversaries, but... today hadn't been the best day. He needed to remember why he was doing this.
He pulled out the tangle of dog tags and placed them on the floor of the tent.
One at a time.
He untangled one set from the pile.
Carter.
"Hey, Sam," Daniel said quietly. "Sorry that I was so horrible to that other you. She's... not so bad. Bright girl. She was probably a wonderful little fact-checker."
Daniel rubbed his finger over the face of the tag, wondering how long it would be before the letters started to fade. He couldn't quite remember. He couldn't remember a lot of things, these days.
"What have I been up to since the last time we chatted? A lot, really. We finished that new irrigation system. I don't think that I was too helpful. I tried not to be." Daniel swallowed hard and stopped for a moment. "Anyway, if we fucked up again, we might get another team down here. Another you. That would be a kick. Would you get along with yourself?"
Daniel swallowed again. It was too soon for him to do this. He should have waited. Carefully, he placed Sam's tags back on the ground.
And there was a line of blood along the front of one, now. From his hands. Daniel wiped his hands on his robes, picked up the tags and wiped them off. "God, Sam. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'll be more careful next time. I promise," he murmured softly. Or maybe he just thought it. He wasn't always that sure, these days.
He looked down at his hands and then wiped them on his robes again, checking and rewiping, until he was satisfied that he wouldn't rub off on anything important.
He reached out blindly, pulling the other two sets of tags free from each other, leaving one to lie in a pile.
He ran his finger along the raised letters.
Murray.
"Teal'c, old buddy. Long time, no see," Daniel said. "So, I killed you today. Again. This time, you asked me to. Does that make a difference?"
The tags fell from from his hands and he didn't bother trying to pick them up again. Teal'c had been so damn close to being Teal'c.
"He said that it would be an honor. How the hell could you do that to me, Teal'c?" Daniel said, his voice no louder than a whisper. "An honor to die? Because of the things that I told him he was capable of. Because he trusted me. Just... just the way all of you did."
He almost didn't reach for the last set of tags.
Jackson.
"I just want to believe that it was all worth it, in the end," Daniel whispered. His tags felt so light in his hand, while Jack's felt so heavy around his neck. "That I fixed things. That right now, Daniel Jackson is with his best friend, with his family. I don't care about the rest of it anymore. Would you hate me for that, Daniel Jackson? That I... that we could become this kind of man?"
Slowly, he gathered up Teal'c's and Sam's tags, wrapping them around his own and placing them back inside the pack.
He reached inside his robes, touched Jack's tags softly.
Please, let the future be worth this.